Absence
by DECOMA
Summary: One encounter in a park turns Naomily's life upside down, will they pull through? Who is Claudia? Is she real, a figment of Emily's imagination or is she real.  Largely from Emily's point of view
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1, Old ties. **

"Let's just run away, ok?" Emily whispered into Naomi's ear whilst they cuddled watching re-runs of some quiz show. The room was dark and only the TV illuminated Naomi's pale face. Her mouth pursed and then she looked at Emily. Blue eyes connecting with Brown.

"Hmm... depends." Naomi finally said. Emily looked frustrated.

"Depends on what?" Emily questioned, her hand squeezing Naomi's tighter.

"Well, depends on where, as much as I love you Emily, our budget doesn't exactly go far." Emily looked at the TV, the sounds of fake laughter of the audience invaded her head.

"We don't have to splurge out you know, we could just go camping or something, by a lake." Naomi smiled.

"Oh god, broke back mountain style? Bit too lesbian for me to handle, what with all the oils and stuffs." Emily cringed at the memory of the two on her bedroom floor awkwardly describing lesbian sex.

"Don't forget the brogues and strapons hey!" They laughed and Naomi looked again to the TV. Their hands fit perfectly together as they always had.

Silence invaded the room.

"So how about it Noam's? I just want to get away you know, Bristol is ok, but there is a bigger world out there." Naomi flicked the channel on the TV to a simple black and white movie. She laughed at the film, and turned again back to the quiz show, just in time for the last question 'Where is Latvia?'

"I don't know Em's. I have work and stuffs to think about." Emily looked at the TV and back to Naomi, who was too concentrated on the TV to notice Emily's frown. She kissed Naomi's cheek and went to the kitchen. She pulled a bottle of Vodka out of the cupboard and swigged. She held the bottle and stared out of the window into the 7 o'clock darkness and at the barely visible stars.

"I'm going on a walk" She shouted to Naomi before grabbing her coat and walking out.

Naomi sat and played with her thumbs, watching the clock tick by, it had been 20 minutes and Emily was not back. She went to the bedroom; to the bed side draw and pulled it open. Two tickets to Bruges, Belgium for a drunken drugged up weekend of love; lay under a pamphlet for Chlamydia testing. She stared at the tickets, dated for the following morning. Her hand found her pocket and she phoned Emily.

"Hello, Em, I decided we are going ok, we're leaving tomorrow morning, I'll tell you where when we get there." And the answer phone died.

Emily's phone vibrated in her pocket indicating a phone call. It was Naomi. She avoided the call and it went to answer phone. Her swing moved back and forth in the cool breeze. Emily stared at the old collage, and all the memories and friends she used to have. Her sister Katie, who now worked as a hair stylist in London, surprisingly Katie was successful at the job and lived with her new boyfriend; who was a bit of a prick. Effy, she moved away and Emily wasn't quite sure where, and why. Jay J, always had a spot in Emily's heart, he was a lovely polite boy who would never do anything wrong and was exceptionally intelligent, he works abroad researching and exploring new and different species. She didn't know about the rest, nor did she care, in the end everyone leaves but she really hoped Naomi wouldn't, she didn't know where she would be without Naomi. Probably still following in Katie's shadow, or with some other not as good girl. Wind pushed Emily's hair into her eyes and for the briefest moment blinded her, in that moment a girl had appeared in the park. She was different and un-familiar. Her seemingly long dark hair was hung loosely by her shoulders, her denim jacket was flapping in the light breeze to reveal a black almost see through top and satanic cross. Black heavy lipstick covered her lips and her eyes were as dark as the surrounding sky. She wore black Dr Martens and patterned leggings. Emily, suddenly stiffened, something about this girl was off, she wasn't wearing normal clothes and her dark eyes boar into Emily like nothing ever before. The girl sat on the swing next to her, lit up a smoke and puffed. She turned to face her and Emily quickly looked away.

"Hi." A strangely feminine voice spoke over the night's silence. She turned to see the girl, who actually had green eyes.

"Hello." Replied Emily, her voice slightly quivering. She cradled her shoulders from the cold air.

"Want a smoke?" The girl asked. Emily questioned herself and then replied.

"Sure, thanks."

"I'm Claudia." Claudia said, handing her cigarette to Emily.

"I'm..." Emily considered whether to give her actual name or not, as Claudia was giving out a strange vibe. "Effy." It was the first name that came to her head. She smiled and took a drag, the smoke going deep into her chest, clouding her thoughts for a second and suddenly she felt less on edge.

"Hi, Effy. Nice to meet you. How come you are out here all alone?" There was something about sharing a cigarette that meant an automatic bond between the two people, it could be the exchange of germs on the filter end or it could be experiencing the same thing at the same time, but Emily suddenly felt slightly friendlier with the girl. And it wasn't down to the fact that Emily found Claudia to be pretty irresistible.

"Nice to meet you too." Emily took a last drag and handed it back to the girl, who had gotten slightly closer.

"I haven't seen you around here much before." Claudia said in an intrigued voice.

"You must not have been looking. "Emily joked. "I live just up there with…" Should she mention Naomi, of course she should, they've been together for 2 years now, but something in Emily was telling her not to. "…My cat." Her cat? She didn't even own a cat, nor ever had one. What the hell was she thinking?

"Aw, lonely cat woman, cute. I live down but the pub. I spend a lot of time there, I haven't seen you there, do you go?"

"Not very much anymore." Emily wasn't in the mood to talk. She stared at the girl and she stared back.

"Oh." Claudia stared into Emily's brown eyes, and then to her lips then back again. Emily licked her lips and looked away. Suddenly Claudia dropped her cigarette and grabbed Emily by the head and kissed her. Claudia's hands working against Emily's body. Lips locked, daringly pulsing. Emily kissed back and held Claudia by the waist grabbing onto what could, begging for more. Before pushing away and jumping to her feet. Her sleeve wiped the spit off of her lips. The girl licked her lips and sat back on her swing. Emily stared at her, half wanting to kiss her again and half wanting to run to Naomi. She chose the latter and ran home.

Naomi put away the last knife before loading up the dishwasher again. The previous night's party still had remnants in the sink. She piled the dishwasher and flipped the switch to the kitchen off as the front door slammed shut. Emily ran to Naomi and hugged her tightly.

"Wow, Lezzer, you missed me?" Naomi joked. Emily looked up into her blue eyes. She suddenly pulled Naomi's head towards her own and kissed her lips hard. Naomi got the message and kissed back lifting Emily onto her hips, Emily's lips worked at double speed against Naomi's.

"Wow," Naomi said between kisses "You've gotten good." She was surprised at Emily's sudden advance.

"Shut up and kiss me." Emily ordered. It was nothing Naomi had ever heard from Emily, and she liked it.

Naomi pushed Emily against the wall with a thud, which only caused Emily to kiss harder and hold onto Naomi's hair. Naomi held Emily's legs close to her thighs and kissed back harder. Electric impulses shot all over Naomi and it gave her a new energy. Then Emily suddenly stopped.

"Hey, I was just getting into that!" Naomi complained sarcastically. Emily looked down at the floor. The silence returned.

"I'm sorry; I'm not in the mood anymore." Emily excused, and walked up the stairs to the bedroom.

"Wow that was good." She leaned against the wall and thought of the tickets to Bruges lying on Emily's pillow; she waited for a reaction from Emily which never came. After a few minutes she followed her up to the bedroom. However, Emily wasn't in the bedroom, she was in the spare single bedroom. Naomi sighed and went to her their bed, picked up the tickets and held them in her hand.

"So much for you." She placed them in the side draw.

There was a knock at the door. She flicked the light back on.

Naomi opened it to a slightly ruffled gothic looking girl with black slightly smudged lipstick.

"Hello?" Naomi greeted awkwardly. Holding the door close to her, for a sort of comfort.

"So you're the cat?" Claudia giggled to herself.

"Excuse me?" Naomi smirked and then went cold.

"Don't worry, must have gotten the wrong house. Does Effy live here?"

"Oh you're a friend of Effy? What would you like?" Naomi looked the girl up and down and assessed that Effy would probably hang around with her sort nowadays.

"Well I was just with her, and she sort of ran off, I thought I saw her come her?"

"She's in Bristol? I didn't know, well she isn't here, I'm sorry, but you can come in if you like." Naomi let the girl in and shut the door with a click.

At the click, Emily awoke and heard Claudia's voice downstairs, talking to Naomi. Her eyes shot wide open and she froze.

"So how do you know Effy?" Emily heard Naomi's muffled voice say to Claudia. She slowly rose from the bed and edged towards the now shut door.

"We just met actually. Kind of an instant connection you could say." There was an excited sinister edge to Claudia's voice that made Emily shiver.

"Oh cool, would you like something to drink? We have vodka or tea. Sorry about the lack of choice I either drink one or the other, sometimes both, depends on the occasion." Naomi laughed. Claudia laughed slowly and asked for tea.

The kettle brewed and Naomi and Claudia moved to the living room. Emily crept out onto the landing and sat at the top of the stairs.

"So, I never caught your name sorry, I'm Claudia."

"Naomi Campbell."

"Naomi? I think I've heard of you before, did you go to Roundview college?"

"I did! what a shit hole! Did you, I never saw you there?"

"Oh no I didn't, I knew some one who did, a boy called Cook. Bit of a twat but he was a good fuck."

Naomi laughed and agreed and the two laughed with each other. Emily moved closer to the bottom to get a better look, there was a creak of the stairs and the two girls both looked, Emily ran back upstairs and into the main bedroom.

"Emily, my girlfriend." Naomi stated, just as Claudia was about to say Effy. It pieced together for Claudia and she suddenly felt smug.

"Oh I see."

Emily jumped onto the bed and pulled her belt off and into the side table which was slightly agar. She peered inside and saw the two tickets. She pulled them out and examined them. Departing from London on Euro star to Brussels, Belgium and an extra ticket on train the place called Bruges. She collapsed at the regret in her head at the thought of fucking it all up again. Hopefully Claudia won't fuck it up. Naomi must have really wanted to go.

Naomi finished her tea with a last gulp and stared at Claudia.

"Do you like Quiz shows? We watch a lot of them, well I say we, I do and Emily just sits there. Kinda funny actually." The conversation was dying between the two. Claudia watched the stairs and then looked to Naomi.

"Actually, what are you doing tomorrow, I might come back then."

"Well, I was, no me and Emily are going to Bruges, Belgium. Why?"

"Oh ok, no reason I just thought then I could see Effy. I have to go, goodnight."

"Goodnight, I'll show you out." Naomi raised, Claudia put her hands out to stop her.

"No, I know the way." She smiled and silently left with one more glance up the stairs.

Emily sighed heavily, before walking down.

"What was all that about?" Emily faked ignorance. She walked over to Naomi and sat on her lap.

"Oh just some girl who knew Effy or something. Are you ok Em's?" She was concerned about the now colourless Emily. "You don't look ok." Naomi joked and kissed Emily.

"I saw the tickets. Thank you Naomi, I would love to go. I love you, you know."

"I know. I can't wait either." She smiled and carried her upstairs.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2, Running.**

Naomi's hand reached itself over Emily's waist and found its place holding her. She held Naomi's arm there with her own and cuddled more into her. The covers just covered Emily's lower body. Naomi still had her eyes closed but was very much awake. Emily's eyes were wide open and staring at her reflection in the alarm clock. A slight smudge of black was on Emily's bottom lip; she quickly wiped it off with her tongue and tasted the smoke. Claudia's face shot into her mind and she rolled over to face Naomi.

"Moring beautiful, breakfast, eggs, I can fry, poach, scramble, do you any way you like." Naomi joked and removed her arm from Emily's warm body to rub her tired eyes. Emily removed her covers and walked, naked to their dresser and stared at herself. She looked rough, she was skinnier than usual. She held her hand on her stomach and stood up straight. Naomi opened her eyes and looked at her.

"Jesus Em's don't get any skinnier. I don't want to fuck bones." She joked and too got out of bed naked. She walked over to Emily and put her hand on Emily's shoulder.

"We have 5 hours until we need to be on that train, it takes 2 just to get there, so better get ready." She kissed Emily's neck and pulled a top and underwear on and walked out. Emily remained. She tucked a stray hair behind her ear and went to get changed.

Naomi set the toast on, got the butter and knife out and laid the table with glasses of orange juice and a daffodil. She put her hands on her hips and admired the work of art she had made in the few seconds. When the toast was done she buttered it and put them on the plates and sat down.

"Em's come down, breakfast is ready!" Naomi called. Emily walked down the stairs with a baggy t-shirt on and hot pants.

"Bit too hot for breakfast don't you think?" Naomi joked and sat down and ripped a bite of toast off.

Emily raced into the kitchen with a smirk on her face.

"Last night was good." Emily sat down and sipped her orange juice. Naomi laughed.

"I thought so, I tried that new technique was is good?"

"If orgasming 10 times in 1 hour is good then sure" Emily laughed and ate her toast silently.

"What's up Em's?" Naomi asked, finishing her slice of toast, and drinking her juice. Emily stopped her toast.

"I'm tired you know, I've just been a little ill, but its good now, I really want to go to Bruges." She smiled and held Naomi's cold hand.

"Sure. Anyway, best get showered, don't want to smell like shit when we go on holiday, people might think we had sex or something. That wouldn't be right." Naomi winked, finished her juice.

Emily sat in the back of the taxi cab holding the warm hand of Naomi they both looked to each other and smiled, the first genuine smile Emily had made in a few weeks. Naomi noticed and kissed her girlfriend. She opened her eyes to see the male cabdriver watching in the rear view mirror.

"Want to fuck off? Im not paying you to get an image to wank over!" The man scowled and did not look again. Emily laughed and Naomi laughed too, and they both laughed and it was the first honest laugh they had shared and they both loved every minute of it. They both stopped and Naomi slowly moved her hand finger by finger across the cab seats to Emily's legs. Emily watched Naomi's hand with great interest. Her hand crept up the side of her leg and then delicately between the two. Naomi looked at her hand and Emily looked at Naomi. Emily stopped her with her hand and pulled Naomi's off and onto the seat again. Naomi looked up and smiled. Emily stared at her and smiled delicately. Neither of them knew what was going on, but both understood.

"So Bruges, a medieval village town, full of foreign tourists, hit men and sex. Sounds fun." Emily's husky voice broke over the silence. The cab driver attempted to look at the girl, but refrained at Naomi's stern look.

"Yeah, don't forget the sex shops and chocolate. Full of 'em." Naomi laughed and looked out of the window, clutching Emily's hand harder.

"How long are we going for again?" Emily asked, looking at Naomi's soft blonde hair and how it now fell just below her shoulders.

"Urm, as long as we like? The place is really cheap, I've saved a few, and the trains run whenever." Naomi stated in a bored tone. Emily caught on.

"What's first thing we'll do?" Emily enquired in a suggestive tone.

"Well I mean, if we discount the sex in the hotel room and then in the hall way…and then in the alley… and the hotel again... sight-seeing?" Naomi pushed a hair piece behind her ear and smiled at Emily and winked. Emily slightly blushed, and in her husky voice spoke;

"Woah, that's going to be a bit noisy, are you sure all the pensioners that live their can handling it? Don't really want a load of old people outside the room suffering from heart attacks, brought on by too much excitement." Emily laughed, Naomi did too and then both leaned forward to stop laughing.

"I don't know how good you think you are, but darling' you can't cause the sudden death of old age pensioners from your sex!"

"I can too! I'm amazing!" Emily playfully hit the back of Naomi's head and Naomi couldn't restrain from laughing. The cab driver coughed a little to clear his throat, this time Emily looked at him with stern eyes and his attention was fully on the road.

"Are we really discussing how our sex will cause pensioners to have heart attacks?" Emily patted Naomi on the back when she has stopped laughing. Naomi turned to Emily slightly red faced and smiled.

"No, we're discussing how your sex cannot." Naomi winked.

The cab driver coughed,

"We're here." He said.

The couple got out of the car and removed their luggage, Naomi paid the driver. They both stood at the foot of the entrance to the train station, one hand holing the others, and the other hands holding their suitcases.

"Let's go." Naomi lead the way, still holding Emily's hand, Emily stayed still and Naomi flung backwards and into Emily, they embraced and kissed. Naomi kissed harder, and then pulled away. "Save some for the actual trip." Then smiled and walked onwards. Emily licked her lips and followed.

The hotel was shit. The service was even more so. When they opened the not so automatic door, a man grunted to show him to be the owner. Naomi and Emily took their bags to his desk and steadied them. The room was dark, the walls wood panelled with various beer glasses stuck to them in a 'trying to be original way'. But that was what the pub back in Bristol looked like, just minus the shattered glass, and here the glasses were supposed to be there. Around the small reception area were a few dark wood side tables, which apparently were supposed to be dinner tables. The man, wearing a tightly fitting *Over his huge beer belly* vest top, and suspended trousers grunted again to ask their names.

"Naomi Campbell, I book a room a while ago for the week?" It wasn't really a question, but she felt the need to question the man's capability of understanding her. He grunted in ignorance. He stared at a hard faced Naomi and then to an awkward red headed Emily.

"So the rooms?" Naomi encouraged. The man grunted and chucked a key at Emily from under the reception desk, she barely caught it and it dropped to the floor. As she collected it she saw a reflection in a glass bottle. A flash of black from outside the hotel door. She turned quickly to see the back end of a refined gothic girl walking away. Claudia. Emily stood slowly back up, and breathed heavily. Naomi pushed gently at Emily to tell her to walk to the stairs behind the desk. The man watched intently as they did so, grunting to say goodbye.

With a shove the door gave way to the drab room. The walls were covered in a 1970's cigarette yellow wallpaper, the floor was a floral red and a brown rug lay in the middle. A shabby double bed lay against the left wall, next to the toilet door. A window resided at the end of the room, revealing a side alley, which at the end of the rough neck houses showcased the majestic tower of Bruges. Emily dropped her suitcase by the window and collapsed onto the bed, which shuddered and a crack filled the room. Emily froze and looked straight to Naomi.

"At least the sex didn't break it." Emily laughed and patted the expanse of slightly un-white sheets next to her. There was a residue on the sheets and he wiped her hand on her trousers just in time for Naomi to take off her shoes and jump next to her.

Naomi just stared into Emily's brown eyes. She grabbed a hair from Emily's face and slowly pushed it to the side of her head. Across Emily's red lips, across her soft eye lashes and to her ear. Naomi bit her lip. Emily moved her hand from her side and it slid across the sheets to Naomi's stomach, it stayed there for just a moment then moved itself under the t-shirt. Her fingers traced lines on her waist then to her ribs, hovering for just a moment more and then coming out again; to go to her face. Her finger wavered over her lips and she pressed gently. Naomi smiled. Emily leaned forward into a kiss. Their eyes were only a few mm away from each others, their lips closer. Emily kissed Naomi whilst her hand travelled down Naomi's back and hovered there. Their kissing became more passionate, and Naomi ran her finger through Emily's hair and moved on top of her. Naomi's arms clutched the sheets on either side of Emily's waist. Tugging at them each time she pushed into Emily. Emily wrapped her arms around Naomi and pulled her in close to her chest. Naomi pulled back to admire Emily, and then quickly pulled off her own t-shirt. Emily stared at Naomi and then giggled  
>"Nice tits." Emily joked and pulled Naomi back in. Naomi traced the outline of Emily's mouth with her tongue, and then slowly edged inwards. Just before she pulled back out, and kissed her face all over. Her right hand placed itself on Emily's chest. Emily grabbed Naomi's wrist and lead it down her chest, to her stomach and down to her legs. Then the bed cracked again and Naomi's arms gave way, she fell onto Emily.<p>

"Oi!" cried Emily and laughed. Naomi laughed too and Emily could feel the laugh building and Naomi's heart beating fast against her own.

"Let's go sight-seeing!" Naomi jumped off of Emily, grabbed her t-shirt and shoes and ran to the door; Leaving her flustered on the bed.

Naomi ran across the cobbled road, Emily tailing behind, with the map they were supposed to be following.

"Uh, Naomi, we were supposed to turn there." Emily shouted to Naomi, whilst trying to get a breath in.

"I don't turn for anybody." Naomi laughed and let go of Emily's hand to check out a shop window, both hands and head pressed against the window to see. Naomi signalled for her girlfriend to look at the window. She stepped back and smiled. On looking Emily saw what Naomi was trying to show; a Giant milk chocolate penis was staring her right back in the face.

"Ew!" Emily cried, and burst out laughing. An elderly couple briskly walked past tutting. Emily looked again and noticed at the head of the chocolate penis was white chocolate depicting cum. "Oh man, we need to get one." Emily looked more intently at the piece and noticed a woman staring back at her, the woman tapped on the window for the two to shove off. Naomi put her middle finger up to the woman and they walked off. She hugged Emily from behind and whispered into her ear.

"You ok?"

"I'm good, you?" Emily turned her head slightly and felt Naomi's breath on her neck.

"I'm good too. Would be awkward if I wasn't." She laughed and kissed Emily. She hovered there for a moment and then let go completely and ran off again. Emily sighed and ran after her, chucking the map down onto the floor. A flash of Black. Emily swirled around to see Claudia, but she was just turning a corner away from her.

"What the hell." Emily mumbled to herself.

"Oi, Emily! Get your ass over her before I fuck someone else." Naomi called. She hesitated for a second and followed Naomi's voice. "I'm waiting!"

"Coming." Emily responded.

"You will be." Naomi scoffed. They found each other; Naomi leaned against a metal fence, separating her from a beautiful little pond. It was oddly perfectly placed in the outskirts of the town. On the other side of the pond was a big wall covered in Ivory and small red flowers. Emily went towards Naomi who grabbed her and kissed her lips.

"Now, there are so many sights to see, and so many things to do. I'm going to start with this pond and do you." Naomi winked.

"You know, can we look around a bit more, its just I feel a little bit out of place fucking here." Emily held hers arms and slouched into Naomi.

"Well that's fucked the weekend plans. Where do you want to go?"

"How about that tower?" Emily asked.

The tower enclosed over 500 narrow steps to reach to top, and a lot of fat families.

"No offences but you're a bunch of fucking Elephants." An Irish man complained to one of the fat families. Naomi quickly grabbed Emily's hand whilst the receptionist to the tower was busy and they ran through. They ran the first 100 steps to the top and heaved themselves up the rest.

"Jesus, you would think with the amount of exercise we do we would be able to do this!" Naomi complained at the 200th step.

"Sex doesn't count as exercise Noam's."

"Yes it does! Burns 800 calories, but how we do it, I would think 1000's" A man from behind the couple grunted in disapproval. Naomi swore at the man, and Emily apologised for her.

230

300

370

450

A flash of Black.

Emily froze, it was a very narrow staircase and it would be impossible for Claudia to be there without her noticing. A red haired girl brushed past a now stationary Emily, the girl was small and beautiful. Emily looked at her and then to Naomi. Naomi has just finished checking the girl out too.

"Come on Lezzer." She beckoned and Emily followed.

At the top of the tower Naomi held Emily's hand and they both looked over the edge, over looking the entirety of Bruges and its medieval architecture and canals. From here you could not see the hotel they were staying in, which probably helped Bruges keep its tourists. Emily looked into the tower room, on the other side was a gothic looking girl facing outwards. From this view she could not see whether it was Claudia, but she had a pretty good idea. Emily tugged Naomi's arm to look around, as she did the gothic girl did too. It was not Claudia, but instead a woman of about 60 she smiled at Emily and then walked back down the tower.

"What's up?" Naomi queried and hugged Emily from behind. She held Naomi's arms and just replied;

"It's beautiful."

Naomi took Emily's hand and ended;

"Let's find a pub."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3, Distorted perception**

The doors swung open and the crowd silenced. Unlike most movies, the crowd starting talking loudly almost immediately, and for that Emily was relieved. Naomi led the way into the Irish pub, and straight to the counter,

"Two of whatever is cheapest, please." Naomi smirked and then ignored Emily. Emily surveyed the pub for seats. The pub was relatively small; it was like everything else on the outskirts of town, more like a local for the Belgians. The roof was low and covered in various fishnets and holding many multi colours jars and glasses. What was it with Belgians and glasses? She studied the roof as the glass pattern descended on the wall and to a booth. In the booth was Claudia. Emily froze. Claudia was sat with the red haired girl from the tower. What she doing here? Emily quickly looked to Naomi – she wasn't looking- She ran over to Claudia.

"What are you doing here?" Emily ordered. Claudia just smiled and held the girls hands in her own. Claudia wore black circular glasses, her hair rugged down by her neck, a black jacket and short shorts. Her typical Dr Martens clunked on the floor.

"I'm here for a romantic weekend with Hayley." Hayley looked awkward and shrunk into the chair. Claudia held Hayley's chin up and kissed her. Emily flinched and looked away.

"What the fuck! Why Bruges? Why today?"

"I just wanted to see your cat." Claudia smiled and pulled her glasses down slightly.

"What? Never mind, just leave us alone ok?"

"I'm not the one who came over and talked to me." Emily held her arms, and pushed a hair behind her ear in irritation.

"Just leave off." Emily was about to turn away when Claudia spoke.

"Do you want Naomi to know about us?"

"There is and never was an _us_. You kissed me, it meant nothing. Now fuck off."

Claudia pulled her glasses off and folded them onto the table. Emily walked back to Naomi who was now carrying the tray of two beers to a small table on the far side of the room, on looking Claudia's booth.

"Hey, what's up? You look like shit." Naomi asked, she was rude but she cared.

"Nothing, I thought… never mind, I'm thirsty." Emily gulped her beer, and then spat some out over the table and cringed.

"What the hell is that?" Emily complained.

"I don't know, its cheap booze drink up" Before Naomi could say another word Emily was necking down the glass. When it was almost finished Emily stopped, closed her eyes and swallowed the mess of liquid. Naomi took a swig of her drink and clapped Emily. A few of the other customers stopped to watch Emily, but continued talking as soon as she swallowed. She looked over to Claudia who was kissing Hayley.

Claudia's hand pulled Hayley's body closer to her own and Hayley moved onto Claudia, her legs on either side of the others, just a little higher than her thighs, only just touching. From Emily's angle she could only see Claudia and the girl's heads working in opposite directions swapping sides at intervals. Claudia moved to the girl's neck, and the girl relaxed her head backwards and let Claudia's lips caress her. Her lips moved to Hayley's collar bones and back to her neck, again to her lips. At the touch of lips, Claudia opened her eyes and Green bore into Brown.

Emily quickly turned to Naomi who was at that moment finishing her beer; she shot her hand in the air and shouted

"More please." The man grunted and flapped his cleaning towel over his shoulder to make the order.

Naomi pushed two more glasses of beer towards Emily. She grabbed Emily's hand and drew patterns with her thumb and smiled.

"I'm glad you're here you know." Naomi swigged her beer and winked at Emily.

"You know what; I am in the mood to fuck. Let's do it right now." Emily said, there was a new found enthusiasm in her voice and Naomi liked it. Naomi shot up and walked into the bathroom. "Glamorous..." Emily whispered to herself. She looked once more at Claudia, who had Hayley laid on the seat whilst she was kissing her from above. Emily shouldn't, but she couldn't stop looking, a spark of jealousy surged in her and it filled her with emotions she hadn't felt in a long time.

The stall door crashed open, she grabbed Naomi in a two hand clasp and kissed her hard, and Naomi kicked the cubical door shut and kissed Emily into it. Emily tried to find skin, anything that would bring her closer to Naomi. She pulled Naomi's top off and kissed her neck whilst her hands searched for the bra clip. Naomi thudded Emily against the door again and stared into brown eyes. However the brown were the wrong shade, they were a strong dark brown, only seen when she was exceptionally turned on. Or in this case angry. Emily ripped the bra off with her teeth and pressed herself against Naomi hard. Her hand found a gap between the two of them and she led it down Naomi's stomach and un-hooked her jeans. Naomi shot her eyes straight into Emily's and bit her lip. Emily's hand slowly slid into Naomi's underwear. They both we silent for a moment, as the door opened and someone used the toilet next to them.

"Don't mind me." A woman's voice rang, after an awkward silence she washed her hands and left.

As the door swung shut, they looked at each other.

Raw passion shone bright through Naomi's Safire eyes. Emily closed her eyes and went straight back in. Her lips worked Naomi hard, pulsing and with each kiss sending shudders down Naomi. Naomi balanced Emily on her hips and with her hands pulled Emily's top off. Revealing nothing but skin. She kissed down Emily's neck to her collar bones, along her shoulders. She pushed Emily back into the door with every thrust of Emily's hand. Emily suddenly withdrew her hand, kissed Naomi hard on the lips, jumped down, grabbed her top and left Naomi. Naomi stood there topless in a toilet cubical. The tap sounded for a moment and then the hand dryer then the door.

"She's such a mind fuck." Naomi grabbed her top, put it on, stuffed her Bra into her bag and walked to the mirror.

Emily stormed out of the bathroom straight to Claudia, they were no longer making out, but as she approached Claudia leaned in for more. Emily slapped Claudia, took Hayley by the hand, and kissed her, pushed her against the booth wall and kissed her. Briefly pushing her hand up the girl's top. She paused, and then ran out.

Naomi faced the mirror, cleaned her hands and face, aligned her hair, sighed and walked out into the bar. The customers looked at her, paused and carried on again. She saw a ruffled red haired small girl standing against the wall of an empty booth and smiled. She sat down at their table and finished the beer with a new found enthusiasm for life. The red haired girl was staring at Naomi. A vibration from Naomi's back stole her attention.

'_Sorry Naom's. I remembered I dropped my phone at the foot of the tower. Meet me in the hotel room? X' _

She texted a reply, swigged her beer and got up. The red haired girl was still staring at her, hands behind her back and staring. The bar man grunted to say goodbye, she smiled at him, he froze and smiled back, a lovely genuine smile. Naomi felt today was beautiful.

Emily stared at her rough reflection in the grimy mirror. _What the fuck are you doing?_ She thought. Her eyes were an unnatural black and she hated it, her hands rubbed them, once opened they seemed lighter. Emily loved Naomi, she really did but she never had to face a situation where there was one girl who could damage her relationship. She had only known the girl for 1 day at most and exchanged few words and a smoke. Nothing more. And yet she felt a connection that went deeper than just looks. It was as if there was something inside of her that yearned for Claudia. Yearned for her body, for her skin- _No._ She yearned for Naomi. She wanted to forget it all, just go back to how it was in the first place, the awkward eye contact in collage, going to night clubs, doing MDMA, having PJ parties and friends, and more importantly having Naomi. The one moment she wished she could relive is waking up in the middle of the night in the woods with Naomi, by a dying out campfire and just watching her sleep. How her chest rose and fell, how she moved when she slept and how at one point Emily's hand touched hers and Naomi held it and didn't let go. Just that moment, before she ran away, after they fucked. Just that perfect moment, she wished everything was like that again. But she wasn't that girl anymore.

Emily pulled her suitcase onto the bed and undid a side pocket, in the side pocket was a small blue pill. She stared at it, as it sat in her hand, rolling around at the movement of her fingers. She placed it in the centre of the dresser, and made her self a glass of water, which she placed next to it in a perfect line. The light from the window was fading slowly in the wintery evening. A new gloom came over her. She poured the water down the drain and replaced it with straight vodka.

The bed creaked as she sat on it, staring at the pill and vodka. Her head was in her hands. It was too early to end it all. That one pill will change everything, everything will change, things will go back to they way there were, she would be happier, it would be as though none of this happened. For her anyway, this pill can change her memory but it cannot remove others. She would wake up innocent and everyone around her would know the truth.

Naomi walked into the hotel reception, the man behind the bar grunted and stared at her; she forgave his brutishness and smiled. He too stared like the previous man and smiled, genuinely. She felt content with herself for the first time in a bleady long time. She ascended the stairs to the corridor to the room. Her walk found a new grace and it wasn't because she just had the best fuck in an age. Her handbag swung effortlessly by her side as she approached the door. The door was now in front of her, she went for the handle.

Emily stared at the door, as the handle rattled under the lock. She attempted to remove the glass from the dresser but in doing so flicked the pill across the room, she necked the vodka.

Naomi rummaged in her bag for the key.

Emily placed the glass in the sink and tried to spot the pill. She ran to the window and looked around.

Naomi found the key and tried to slot it in the key hole, but the little amount of beer seemed to have had an effect on her, she couldn't aim for the hole right. _The irony, a Lesbian cannot get in the hole._

Emily gave up her search and chucked various clothes over the floor to hide it.

Naomi un-locked the door and walked in, dropped her bag on the floor, and looked at Emily.

"Wow, you look bad, are you ok?" Naomi asked, she felt concern for Emily. She had been acting strange. Naomi walked over to Emily and hugged her, Emily feebly held on to Naomi's hips.

"I'm fine, honestly. Really tired. Too much fucking for one day." She laughed and went into the toilet room for a shower. Naomi made the bed up neat and got changed into a silky dress top she brought specially for this trip. Emily loved the feel of silk. She climbed into the left side of the bed and shut her eyes, listening the flurry of water from the shower.

Emily leaned against the wall of the grimy blackened –from age- shower. She squeezed a dollop of shampoo out of a bottle and washed her hair. As she did so she thought of Claudia. Her head shook side to side to get rid of the memory.

_Claudia seemed to be walking down an alley. Claudia stopped at a door, a red door, after three knocks at the door she stepped down from the door step. No once answered. Claudia seemed to look straight into Emily's mind. Emily blinked. Claudia was still there in her mind. _

"_Emily!" Claudia shouted. "Emily!" Claudia was running towards Emily, it was as if Emily was a camera and it was a film. Emily zoomed out, Claudia got further away but at the same time was running forward towards her. _

"_Emily!"_

She jumped up from her bed, sweat beads dripping from her head. Naomi moved slightly in her sleep to face the other way. Heavy long breaths fell in and out of Emily's mouth. She let herself fall back onto her pillow and stared at the roof. The wallpaper was dropping in dangerous amounts all over the room; a patch of damp covered every corner. She breathed a final deep breath before closing her eyes to sleep. Whatever was happening she didn't like. Emily can't deal with the drama, not again. That pill would be in her system tomorrow morning. That was the last thing she thought before falling into a deep sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4, Mind games**

The blue pill sat behind the wooden leg of the dresser, watching Emily turn in her sleep. Emily slowly rose from her bed, pulled the covers off of her and stood silently in the darkness. She was still, her eyes were closed and her feet close together. The pill beckoned her to take it. Her foot moved in its direction. Another foot, pulling her ever closer to the pill. The first, edging slowly over the old carpet. Emily tripped over the edge of the brown rug and was suddenly alert.

Her fall woke Naomi from her sleep,

"What's the time?" Naomi, the girl sat next to the alarm clock that night, had asked for the time. Emily; rather disorientated from sleep walking, turned to answer.

"3 A.M. Go back to bed." Emily saw the pill in a flicker of moonlight from the window. She bent down to collect it, looking at Naomi's shut eyes as she did so. Naomi patted the side of the bed next to her, snored and fell back to sleep.

A glass was filled with water, the pill placed back on the table. In these few moments Emily contemplated whether to actually take it. If she took it she wouldn't remember anything and it would be ok, and she could stat again and has a better life. But if it didn't work she would be paralysed and without memory and have no life at all. A life knowing that something happened with another girl is better than a life in a hospital bed, being fed through a tube.

It didn't matter.

She decided long ago when she first agreed to this trip.

The blue pill was placed on the back of her tongue, immediately fizzling; the water crashed over it, a gulp and it was gone.

Naomi rolled over a final time before opening her eyes to the brilliant sunshine of the morning. Her arms raised above her head in a stretch. A yawn escaped out of her mouth. There was a strange dark feeling in the back of Naomi's head and she didn't understand its placement there. Her hand slid across the sheets until it reached an empty cold patch. Her hand stopped and she looked over. Empty. Naomi pushed herself up against the wall to sit. The room was empty, scattered clothes over the floor by the window and nothing. Emily's shoes were gone.

"For fuck sake." She rolled her eyes, in the typical Campbell fashion. On getting up she stumbled on an empty glass rolling on the floor. Naomi picked up the glass and noticed a smudged lipstick mark.

Emily's stomach growled at her as she walked, clutching her arms to the Bruges tower. When she got there as small fence had been put there to signal it being closed. She hopped the fence and ran up the 150 stairs, until she couldn't take it anymore. A small window was just a few steps above her, she managed to get there and looked out. A few building blocked her immediate view of the town. That wasn't right, she needed to see something beautiful before she left. _Naomi. _ Naomi was beautiful, not in the conventional way; she had longish blonde hair, define features with a slender body. She was a feminist and a protester for human rights in her spare time. You could say she was a bit eccentric, but it pleased her. To Emily, nothing was more perfect. And that's why it had to end. She couldn't deal with causing pain to something so perfect, and that is why she regretted the decision to take that pill. It was now slowly eating at her, from the inside. She needed to reach the top of the tower.

200

300

340

370

400

410

Her steps became slower and slower as she ascended the narrow staircase. There was no sunlight at 4.40 A.M in Belgium at this time of the year. She relied on her innate sight; which turned out to be, rather shit. Her hand felt the hard rope tied to the wall for support. She used it the find her footing.

430

450

480

Emily was so close to the top, and so close to the end of it all.

Naomi turned the key in the lock, leaving a note at the base of the door, in case Emily came back. She walked herself to the pub which was open all hours, and seemed to never be empty. The crowd silenced. Then began talking, and a few drunken men from the night before seemed to be singing. Naomi smiled, and walked over to the bar.

"One of whatever you have please." Naomi tilted her head up slightly and narrowed her eyes and laughed, trying to seem important in some way.

"Well Belgium is famous for having over 700 different beers, and each one has its own glass so really, asking for one of whatever is hard, because of the options. How about a normal British beer? We have a few." This time the man did not grunt, but instead he playfully joked and went about getting the drink from his store room. Naomi's eyes wondered over the various shapes and antiquities cluttering the pub, piling from behind the bar and raising up onto the roof. She admired the random décor and followed it down to a stall from the night before. The red haired girl was stood there again. Wearing black converse, brightly coloured jeans, and a ban-tee. Not the typical wear, but she wore it well. The girl didn't look old, in fact she looked quite young, but Naomi knew somehow that the girl was around 17. Red haired and strange, she reminded Naomi of Emily. Except Emily had deep brown eyes, and this girl; this girl had bright blue. Unlike Naomi, these eyes didn't pierce you, but instead melted what force field one had around then, up until the point where that person wants nothing more to do than kiss them softly, announce their undying love and ask to run away with them. Naomi resisted this urge, and simply smiled. The girl blushed slightly, winked, sat deeper into the booth and out of sight. The man returned with a can of some kind, poured the golden substance into a pint glass and gave it to Naomi. She was about to hand the money to him, when he held his hand out to stop her, his palm faced down over the Euro's.

"I can't accept. It's on the house." He smiled, draped his towel over his head and attended to the rowdy drunk men. Naomi pushed the money back into her jean pocket. On surveying the pub, the only available seats where next to lonely old men, on their last pint, holding on to the table for dear life. There was one place, in the booth next to the red head.

"Can I sit with you, I would choose somewhere else, but, old drunk men aren't really my type." She scrunched up her mouth to emphasize her words and then smiled. On getting a closer look at the girl, she noticed that she was very thin and pale, but beautiful. It looked as though she had just recovered from a breakdown, and had just then experienced euphoria. Even so, Naomi thought she was interesting.

The girl nodded and moved over to let Naomi have the whole booth. The girl stared at Naomi, until Naomi caught her eyes sight. Blue met Blue.

"Enjoying Bruges?" The girl asked.

"Yeah, its interesting, very old though, thought there would be more of a party scene." Naomi joked.

"That's Amsterdam." The girl laughed, nervously. Her eyes were wild and they only kept your glance for half a second before darting away. Naomi was intrigued. What was up with this girl? She was different.

"You're strange. What's your name?"

"Hayley. Hayley Adams." The girl replied, with a hint of excitement, but suppressed her enjoyment with a deep cough and a look at the décor. Naomi tapped her finger on her glass and then drank, never not looking at the girl. She placed her glass back on the table mat with a clunk. The girl jumped and then laughed and she hugged her arms awkwardly. _Just like Emily; _Naomi thought of Hayley's mannerisms. Naomi let go of the glass and placed her palms onto the table, shoulder widths apart.

"I'm Naomi. Naomi Campbell. Nice to meet you." She held out her hand towards Hayley. The girl eyed her hands cautiously, looked into Naomi's eyes and smiled.

"Nice to meet you." Hayley seemed to have come out of her invisible self built cocoon. Hayley took her hand and they briefly shook.

"What are you doing here at what? 4.30 A.M." Naomi checked a imaginary wrist watch, whilst her other hands unlocked her phone.

"I…I live here." Hayley said. It was plausible, the two times Naomi had been here, the girl was in this booth, whether it be standing or sitting.

"That must be cool. Living in a pub, free booze!" Naomi slowly drank her beer, maintaining eye contact. As she put her glass down the crowd silenced. A girl walked into the pub, wearing heavy layers, a figure hugging attractive black coat, deep grey skinny jeans, Dr Martens…-_What was it with the seemingly new fashion of Dr Martens, I must get some._- Her hair was long, wavy, rough like she had just woken up, but slightly damp. Naomi noted it was raining outside. The woman shook her hair to rid her self of water, briefly locking eyes with Hayley, her piercing eyes were a unrecognisable colour. She smiled, and walked over to the bar.

Hayley just stared. Naomi smiled to herself, Hayley was defiantly gay.

"You're gay." Naomi stated, laughing. She sipped her drink as Hayley re-entered the conversation.

"No, I'm not. I'm Bi-sexual actually." Hayley replied in a natural tone, to distract by the new girl.

"You can't be Bi-sexual, that doesn't exist. You're one or the other, you'll settle one day." Naomi gulped the last drop and hit her glass to the table.

"I'm going to tell her you like her." Naomi shot her and ran to the bar with a new found energy. Hayley sunk into her booth further. Pulling her legs up to her chest. She stared at the beer ring left behind by the beer glass.

Emily peered over the edge of the tower, staring at the view. Her view was obstructed by a thick fog that now covered the luminous medieval town.

"Fuck!" she shouted to herself. She faced away from the edge, leaning her back against the edge. Hand comforting her arms. Should she jump to the end or would that cause too much destruction in her life, her sister, her dad, Naomi. This has happened way too many times before.

Naomi filled her head.

"_I loved you since the first time I saw you. I think I was 12. It took me 3 years to pluck up the courage to speak to you. And I was so scared of the way I felt, you know, loving a girl. I learned how to become a sarcastic bitch just to make it feel normal. I screwed guys to make it go away but, it didn't work. When we got together it scared the shit out of me because you were the one person who could ruin my life. I pushed you away. I made you think things were you fault, but really I was just terrified of pain." Naomi started to cry, tears falling down her cheek. "But I, I couldn't stand. I didn't want to be a slave to the way I feel about you. Can you understand?" Her words her barely audible, tears droplets fell to the floor. "You were trying to punish me back and it's horrible. It's so horrible because really, I'd die for you." She breathed. "I love you." _

Emily burst out crying, sobbing into her hands. How could she have done this, how could she have attempted to cheat, kissing other girls? She didn't fuck them, no. But that just makes the already bad situation worse.

"I love Naomi!" she shouted at the top of her lungs. There was a creak of floor boards. Emily stopped, suddenly; her brought her head down to normal level from the projection of her shout.

Claudia stood there, cigarette in her mouth, feet crossed, wearing the same clothes as when she had met her. Claudia walked slowly towards her, flicking her cigarette over the edge, grabbing Emily's head with her free hand, pulling her sideways into a heavy kiss. Emily punched Claudia's shoulder, but her attempts became feeble as she came under Claudia's spell of seduction. She attempted one more punch, as her hand slowly attacked her, she punched air. The woman was gone. There was no Claudia. She wiped her moist mouth. Confused, she looked over the edge; the fog lay untouched as if a blanket protecting Bruges form the cold air. Turning back again, she met a cold front of air, revealing still nothing. _Where had she gone?_ Emily ran to the stair case and down a few steps, desperately wanting to find Claudia; who, was no where to be found. She walked back up the stairs to see Naomi standing on the ledge of the tower.

"Naomi no!" Emily pleaded, running to Naomi, who jumped. "NO!" She cried, tears falling at dangerous rates off of her face. On looking over, the fog again lay untouched and so did the town below.

"Hey!" Naomi called to the new girl in the bar. The woman turned and revealed astonishing eyes, green, but luminous and piercing, like her own but the woman's had little black splatters like paint or a tigers stripes, yet less uniform and more 'born that way'. Either way her eyes were the main focal point of her being. She had a thin build, thin cheeks, and pale, but it seemed that she glowed with radiance.

"Hi." The woman replied. She slid her hand across the bar top towards her drink, which was too near Naomi, for her to move without alerting the woman of her insecurity.

"So, anyway, my friend fancies you and we were wondering, are you gay?" The woman was not really a woman, she was around 19 and her lips were very soft. She laughed, and paid the bartender the Euro's.

"I am not gay no." She laughed and walked to the other side towards Naomi. Naomi rolled her eyes and sighed. Before she could call her back she had vanished. Naomi walked back to the booth, to see the woman kissing Hayley.

"Oh." Naomi was pleasantly surprised and smiled._ The fog is really creepy tonight._ Naomi thought, on exiting the bar.

Emily sat on the stone cold floor, back against the wall shaking. She was cold, extremely freezing, with no form of protection. Tears pathetically fell down her pale cheek. Emily could not cry anymore. Partly due to the cold and the other half, the pill had removed her feelings. Her thoughts spiralled. Claudia's head popped up from the staircase, soon followed by her seductive body. Emily feebly crawled over to the staircase in an attempt to touch Claudia again, to feel her skin against her own, to hear her heart beat, to kiss her lips, to stare into those eyes.

Before she knew it she lost her footing and fell down the tower stairs.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5, Confusion. **

Naomi pulled the daffodil out of it's vase and replaced it with a brighter, more alive rose. The heart monitor beeped slowly in the dismal surroundings. The sun shone through the window illuminating the white walls, white bed sheets and white floor. In terms of decoration the hospital will not get first place. Naomi sat down beside Emily's bed and clutched her girlfriend's cold hand. A faint pulse echoed in the heart monitor could be felt.

"Why?" asked Naomi to the air. The tubes going into Emily's nostrils were not enough to put the beauty radiating from Emily at bay. Footsteps could be heard outside, Naomi hoped that the doctor would bring good news. The footsteps faded into the distance. Naomi thought back to what the doctors had said those weeks ago, "She won't make it. She fell down the stairs… In critical condition… It's a miracle that she is still breathing… We found her just in time…" a tear started to form in Naomi's eyes. She looked at Emily's face once more. The stitches covered her cheeks and forehead. Sewn wounds splattered all over her neck and chest. Bandages covered most of her body. Naomi still loved her. Whatever her reason for this was she would try to understand. Nothing came to her as to why Emily would have done this. There has been no problems. She was acting oddly, suddenly wanting to fuck in the pub. Then going out on walks. Was it Naomi? Had she done something wrong? Maybe it was the whole trip, it was random and it wasn't exactly Emily's idea of fun. Naomi realized she wouldn't have minded the camping and stars and woods, if she knew the alternative was sitting by a hospital bed praying that Emily would come out of a coma. She gathered her bags and left the room.

The buttons on her phone beeped at her touch, the phone number dialled; her mother. she waited.

"Mum." Naomi was exhausted.

"Are you there?" she pushed her outgrown hair back over her head. Her skin had become rougher from the stress levels of the last few weeks.

"Naomi, are you ok? How's Emily?" Her mother sounded from the receiver.

"I'm fine. A little weak but I'll survive." She lied. "She hasn't woken up yet, the doctors are expecting her to anytime now, but it's still a miracle that's she's even here. They keep saying that. It's not a miracle, Emily is just special, she always has been…"

"I know dear. Why don't you come home for a bit? You've been at the hospital for weeks now, what about your job?"

Naomi hesitated.

"What if I'm at work and she wakes up? I can't just leave. Work knows this. That's why I took leave, they say I'm welcome back when she's ok. But I don't know when that could be. It could be years."

"So you're unemployed?"

Again she hesitated.

"Yes."

"Come home Naomi!" her mother cried. "if she wakes up the doctors will tell you. Please. You need to eat something at least." Naomi looked at herself, she hadn't eaten in days, her face was very pale and thin. She looked old. Older than her age. She looked ill.

"I'm fine mum. I have to go."

"Naomi-" Naomi closed the phone call. She stated out above the roof tops of the houses and businesses surroundings. The roof was where she spent most of her days, when she needed to think. There was no interference. No one talked, just silence. She watched the cars driving along, wondering how much it would hurt if she survived being hit. She came to the conclusion 'a lot' and disregarded the idea.

Emily's finger twitched very faintly in the room. No body around to capture the site, it may not have even existed, but it was a sign of life.

Naomi didn't know what to do. If Emily didn't wake up she wouldn't have anything to live for. Emily was her livelihood, without her she may as well be dead. She was scared.

"You're always scared." Emily shouted at her, she looked at the rooftop across the way, where Emily once sat, crying. Another tear formed in her eye.

she walked back into the building and found Emily's room once more. Her hands pulled a chair up and be sat down. A nurse came into the room and examined Emily, she checked the machines and hovered just over one. She quickly checked the clipboard at the bottom of her bed. Naomi noticed the strange behaviour.

"What's happened?" Naomi asked, expectantly.

"Nothing, don't worry." the nurse smiled, scribbled something on the clip board and scurried away. A moment later a doctor came in and did the same. All the while Naomi sat watching. Expecting. The man looked at her, an eye brow raised.

"Have you been here, had you noticed anything?"

"Like what?"

"Did you notice anything?" he repeated.

"I went for a walk and just and back."

"This machine shows and records her Brain activity. It says she has just had some brain activity which is more commonly associated with movement."

Naomi raised slightly from the chair, hands clutching the arm rest, she looked slowly from the concerned doctor to Emily, who remained silent in every sense.

"Does this mean she's waking up?" She almost shouted, then remembered this was a hospital.

"It could mean that, or it could be the body shutting down for…. Well you know. But let's keep hope."

SEPTEMBER.

OCTOBER.

NOVEMBER.

DECEMBER.

JANUARY.

FEBRUARY, 23rd.

Naomi stood hands folding bed sheets, staring at Emily's un moved body. It had be 6 months and nothing. There were flickers. She moved he finger, or twitched her eye. The doctors passed it off as reflexes. There was very little brain activity, the doctors wanted to shut her down but Naomi refused. Katie had been a visited almost as much as Naomi had, except Katie had to go back to London, her boyfriend didn't understand how Katie could leave him, but she was more concerned with her Beauty course.

Jay J had visited a few weeks ago, bringing flowers and a song he had written her, but not much more. Cook had visited with a strawberry desert, he persuaded Naomi to come club in with him and his new girlfriend, which resulted in him going off with some new girl and leaving his girlfriend with Naomi, Naomi sat there comforting her, whilst he fucked the girl in the corner of the club. Realistically cook was a twat. But he was a nice twat and deep down he actually cared about people other than himself and where his next shag would come from. Very few people had seen the caring side of Cook and for that didn't want to know him. Naomi always had a soft spot for the undereducated sex freak, because he understood her.

On return to the hospital Naomi had a feeling that Emily had improved.

She hadn't, her brain activity had decreased more slightly in the last few hours. The doctors and NHS seriously considered turning off her life support, the advice was that she would have to go private and pay for it, the NHS couldn't support a lost cause.

To go private would cost thousands, especially for life support. It would be worth it if and when, no, when Emily woke up.

Naomi would need to raise the money.

MARCH.

APRIL.

MAY.

A glimmer. A hope. Dashed by the pessimistic doctors.

JUNE.

JULY.

The event would be worth it, Naomi reminded herself as she was about to go onto the stage. The crowd, mostly old college mates, piss heads, rich tossers, businessmen and sponsors, cheered for Naomi to come onto the stage. The sunlight shone brightly over the curtain that divided her from the crowds. She looked behind her to a series of wires and vans broadcasting a radio link, TV and news reporters. In the last few weeks the event had become massively well known. She started with an appeal to various businesses, private clinics and pharmacies; to gain their support in making life support available until there is no brain activity. Instead of 'when they think there is no hope'.

She breathed, looked to her left to see Katie, thumbs up, bright smile on her heavily done up face.

The blue curtains slowly pulled sideways. Breath. She walked forward, more ran, waving her arms around to grab the crowds attention and get them cheering.

"For those of you who don't know who I am, I am Naomi Campbell and I want your money!" she yelled. The crowd half cheered, half laughed.

"The reality is there are so many lives out there, cut short of their potential of life once more. Once you go on life support there are two options, you survive or you get turned off. That shouldn't be the way, it should be, your come back to us, or we keep trying until, even the patients bored of our help!" She laughed to herself and the crowd reacted two. Naomi wore a brown/green t-shirt, a light colored jumper around her waist and blue jeans. It wasn't the most attractive outfit around, but it was all she could afford as all her money was going on Emily.

"Let's take my Case. Emily Fitch, just 19 years of age, was found at the bottom of a 500 stair tower, having 'tripped down'. Everyone, including myself knew she wouldn't make it. Then there was a glimmer, a sparkle of life that flickered for just a moment. But it was enough to know she was still there. Don't you agree?"

The crowd cheered.

"That flash of light led the way to her being on life support, her brain activity was manic at first and slowly over the past few months has declined. Just last month, there was another glimmer of activity. For a few minutes her brain was on fire with activity. Surely that means she's still alive? The doctors wanted to turn her life support off."

The crowd shot up in protest. The loudest of all was Cook, he was at the front row in a car board box, pretending to be a life support machine, with a rightly colored arrow pointing and in bold red letters, read

"TURN ME ON!" as opposed to Naomi's suggested "KEEP ME TURNED ON!". Cook jumped about and was as wild as ever, bass music played in the background, this was as much a party as a support rally.

"I am not just here for Emily. I am here to support the rest of you out there possibly facing this situation. I am the face of LS- Life support. Supporting life through life support. But I am not the organizer and certainly not the brains!" Naomi joked, cook shouted 'you're hot!' and everyone cheered.

"Thanks!" she giggled sarcastically.

"What I am trying to say is this; this is a serious cause people. Family's are left without closure and wondering 'what if?' the doctors argue that they were a lost cause. We shall never understand the human brain, how do we know that that brain activity is the patient screaming to be recognized? How do we know that the machine is wrong and it isn't showing the whole picture. How do we know? This is the why the charity is campaigning for life support and researching more in depth into the human brain than ever before, using the latest technologies available. But I don't know about all that crap, I failed College. But from what I have learned, this is a great cause and deserves to be made famous! So let's make it famous and do what our generation do best-"

"Fuck!" Cook cut in, the crowd cheered and a group of rowdy teenage boys high fived each other.

"No quite, how about partying for charity? A weekend long party?" she listened to the clapping and whistling and finished,

"Now, the actual brains, try not to fall asleep and remember what you're doing is for a fucking amazing cause. No biased or anything!" She jumped around in mock dancing, as the music jumped in louder and the bass dropped heavy, the crowd cheered and jumped up at the bass dropping, a Dj called out his name from a booth at the far end of the stage, he had black shades on, spiked up hair, a Red t-shirt, and looked like he had just flown in from Ibiza and not changed yet. Which seemed likely. The hot summer sun blazed down on the crowds. The hottest summer in UK history, and they were having a charity weekend long party. The life. Naomi cheered and ran behind the curtains, leaving an energized crowd to face the actual spokesmen, who was a reasonably attractive man wearing a very in-appropriate black suit and white shirt, which was unbuttoned due to the heat. Or rather because Katie had just finished with him.

Naomi's jaw dropped at Katie after seeing her rearrange her clothes and re apply her lipstick.

"Katie?" Naomi joked.

"What bitch, can't take the heat, I just wanted to cool off."

"So you fucked a man, good way to cool off, are you really that bad?" Naomi stuck her tongue out at Katie, and drank from her water bottle.

"Cheeky! Don't see you getting any-" she stopped herself short and her head lowered. Naomi stopped drinking and froze. She tried to suppress a tear. The reality was, Emily was in a coma and there seemed little hope of her recovering. But Naomi kept hope.

"Nope, but it's ok, I can keep my knickers on." Naomi teased. Katie's eyes thanked Naomi for the change of subject.

"Wow Naomi, I didn't think you could pull it off buy you did! It looks amazing. Lots of if boys.. And girls." Naomi raised her eye brow at Katie.

"No Lezzer! I'm the straight one remember!" Katie joked and checked out the man as he returned from the stage. Naomi had realized why the crowd wasn't as hyped, the cheering returned and the music blasted off once more. The event was being held in a very large set of fields, owned by a girl she met once, Hayley. Hayley turned out to be quite rich and owned the pub in Bruges, as well as a big farm house and pockets of land all over the country. Small world.

Naomi looked out over the scenery, it was serene and beautiful, it was hard to realize what the even was for. Such a dark matter in such a light situation.

She walked out from behind the stage to be greeted by cook, wearing the card board box.

"Naomikins! This party is fucking hilarious, some right characters 'ere. Even met a bird." He shouted in her face -pissed- whilst hugging her trough the holes in either side of the washing machine box.

"Cook, I couldn't have said it better myself!"

"Well you know what Naomi, it's all for a good cause, a cause to get fucking hammered, all in support for little Emily. You always were cute together, real love you know, not like these other people nowadays. They just want to fuck around, can't blame them an all, but there's gotta be more, you know? Anyway Naoms gotta run, got some partying to do!" He waved his arms about and syched himself up before running off. He quickly stopped before the edge of the curtain and said;

"Change ya clothes, you're not 55 Naoms, you got life in ya yet!" and then he was gone. Naomi took up his advice and went to one of the vans, which contained her stuff. Everyone one else may have to party all weekend, but they understood her stress and gave her a trailer to sleep in. She didn't do much sleeping, it was more sit down, cry, then get back to the party. She opened the door and there stood Hayley. Her hair was curled and her face dabbed lightly with foundation. There was really no need for the foundation but, it was her choice.

"Hey." Hayley said, she was a lot more open towards Naomi since when they first met. They had gotten closer on the common knowledge of booze and where to club. Hayley didn't live around here. In fact she had no real home, just homes she had inherited from her parents when they died when she was 11, and then inherited from her elderly adopted family. She had a lucky life really having wealth and houses, but she kept telling Naomi it really wasn't all that.

"Hi!" Naomi shouted and hugged her friend. Naomi was extremely hot and so opened all the windows. Hayley watched with mild amusement. Naomi went to her makeshift bedroom, chucked the jumper to the floor and pulled her top over her head. Hayley again watched, but nothing came of it, she simply observed and smiled. Naomi laughed at her and the got changed into her old prom dress, shook her hair about, applied make up and was ready.

"Let's go then!" Hayley said holding he door.

"You know it's rude to watch a girl get changed unless you secretly want to fuck her." Naomi winked and walked out. Hayley hesitated, watched her walk away and shut the door.

Naomi shook her head, she would party all weekend and raise money for this charity an Emily. It was all for Emily.

AUGUST.

Naomi put down the phone from LS. She smiled and wrote down the figures raised from the weekend party and other events since, £7,222,000. So close to £10,000,000 it was an astounding amount, and almost un real to Naomi. It seemed too god to be true, but for once it really was true.

SEPTEMBER.

Naomi stared at Emily's body laying peacefully on the bed. Glimmers were becoming more regular, one expected every week. Maybe a finger twitching. Maybe a whole hand, an eyelid flickering, masses of brain activity in a string. It was un-explainable.

OCTOBER.

Emily spoke.

It has been a year since she slipped into this coma. Naomi and tried to be by her side everyday, whilst campaigning for the charity and keeping her job as a clerk at Asda. At least it wasn't Tesco's.

Naomi's ears pricked up. It wasn't real life. She stood suddenly her hands on Emily's. Emily had spoken. She called the doctors and anyone that was standing near by.

"Emily, baby please speak again." Naomi pleaded, praying for a response, for Emily to be ok. For Emily to be back to normal.

"Clau…" Emily mouthed, the words barely audible, but she heard them. What was 'Clau' ? The doctor came into the room.

"What's the matter?" The doctor asked, not really caring.

"Nao…" Emily spoke more clearly. Naomi clenched Emily's hands tighter.

"I'm here, I'm always here for you." Naomi began to cry, pure happiness poured over her face, Emily's face began to regain colour, a rose red returning to her cheeks. The doctor, eyed Emily, then ran to the various machines in the room. He checked each one and then double checked, making sure this was no mistake. The brain activity was out of this world, a new field of brain activity came over the screen, bright colours flashed. The doctor looked suddenly scared, he started to sweat, silently he turned to Naomi.

"This much brain activity, is most commonly shown before death." Naomi stopped her crying, her big smile slowly faded, the plot drained from her face bit by bit.

"No! No, she's alive I know it ok! Look, look at her face!" The doctor did and noticed the colour was back in her face. He looked relieved and shocked. He spoke softly.

"I'm sorry. I was wrong. I'm sorry, she will survive."

Naomi stared at him in disbelief of his words. She shook his head, and looked deeply at Emily. Emily feebly grabbed Naomi's hand. Then nothing. The brain activity came back to a normal level, the flashing and beeping was no longer alarming. The colour decreased a little in her face, but remained stable at 'ill'.

NOVEMBER.

"Claudia." Emily spoke, clearly as day. Naomi looked up.

"Claudia." Emily repeated. Naomi was surprised her own name was not Emily's first words, but it didn't matter, she was back.

Emily's eyes shot open, the machine went crazy, alarms rang and the flashing returned. The Doctor walked in, turned the machines off and stabilized them.

"Hello Emily. I am Doctor Winston. This is my assistant Julia-" a nurse walked in, brown hair and un natural beauty. "She is here to provide support." Naomi let the doctor talk. Naomi's voice was sore. She rapped herself further in the blanket she had brought the previous month.

"You have been in an accident, you may feel disorinantated, that's ok. You'll be fine now."

The private doctor she has hired was not the nicest bloke, but he was the best around, Emily was awake now and nothing else mattered.

DECEMBER.

Emily sat up on the sofa, Wrapped in blankets, holding her arms. Naomi, sat on the floor un wrapped her last present from her mother; a weekend spa trip for the two of them. Emily felt awkward, Naomi had got her enough presents for a family, and she had nothing to give in return, her apologetic eyes bled into Naomi's.

"It's ok. It's only Christmas, there are plenty more."

"Naomi, can we talk." Emily asked slowly. She removed her blanket and motioned Naomi to cuddle her. Naomi cuddled into her body. Emily placed her arm around the blondes shoulders.

"What about?"

"The accident." Naomi winced. To Naomi it was just a bad memory, but to Emily it was very relevant.

"What about it?" Naomi tried to sound casual.

"I didn't trip. Well I did. But it wasn't just me there." Naomi looked up into the chocolate eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"There was another. Claudia."

"Who's Claudia?" Naomi questioned, completely confused. Emily was shocked.

"Claudia. The girl, the night before we went away to Bruges she came over…"

"No one came over, you went for a walk and returned." Naomi stated, and passed off Emily's words as confusion. She had just woken up from a year long coma.

"No. She came to the house and you met her, and then she followed us to Bruges."

"Em, there is no one we know called Claudia."

"Yes there is! You met her! She was in the pub! She as sin the tower."

"You must have met her in Bruges."

"No! I met her in the park and we kissed!-" Emily shut her lips and looked apologetically at Naomi. Naomi starred in denial at Emily.

"What?" Emily raised her eyes to meet Naomi's dark, disbelieving eyes.

"She kissed me. It wasn't me, I swear it Naomi. She kissed me and I ran home!"

Naomi said nothing.

"Wondered why you were so hot in the hallway." she joked.

"I'm sorry Naomi."

"Don't worry, it's not as though this hasn't happened before. I love you, you know."

"She followed us to Bruges-"

"Stalkerish-" Naomi cut in.

"Let me finish. In the pub, she was there with a red haired girl in the booth kissing her, and I suddenly got angry-"

"There was no one with the red haired girl in the booth all the times we went. Plus, her names Hayley." Emily was going to ask why she knew her name, but didn't care.

"Claudia was with the girl! She practically fucked her right there in front of us, if we hadn't fucked in the toilet I don't know what I would have-"

"So you fucked me in the bathroom because you were what? Jealous?" Naomi accused. She stopped cuddling Emily and sat on the designated other persons side of the sofa.

"No, no. Well yes, but I still wanted it ok?"

"Knew it! You're never as good as that was."

"Hey! That's besides the point. I ran out and back to the hotel and took the pill-"

"What pill?" Naomi was suddenly on edge, she stared deep into Emily's sorry eyes, searching for answers to everything.

"I took a drug, don't ask me what it was I don't know. I got it a few weeks previous to the trip. It was in case of emergencies. In case something happened, I couldn't face life without you."

Naomi crossed her arms, and got up.

"I'm going to need something strong." Naomi returned with a bottle of Bacardi, loosened the lid and drank.

"I took the pill. And I went to the tower. Where I was going to kill myself and I hurt inside, something must have gone wrong because the Pill was meant to knock me out, not burn my insides."

"So it was all planned?" Naomi was shocked, but as for morning vodka shots, followed by brunch vodka challenge, Naomi was pretty out of it.

"It was planned for the event of something happening to you… Anyway. In the tower I saw you, it must have been a hallucination, but you were on the edge and you jumped. Then, well I don't really know the order of events, but Claudia turned up and kissed me, missed me really hard, and then disappeared. She appeared again at the stairs and I went after her, and that's when I fell."

Naomi remained silent.

"So what? Why did you need to take the pill? What was the reason?"

Emily didn't really have an answer. It could have been because she kissed Claudia, but that's life. And they couple had experienced cheating before. It was nothing new. There was no real reason. Maybe it all just got to her, being with Naomi was fun and great, but it wasn't right for her. As much as she hated it, her mother was right. Emily fucked up her life during and after college, Naomi only helped confuse her further. Maybe it was all this sudden realization, that here was no future. She could get by on benefits and Naomi's job; but that wasn't good enough, she needed to prepare for life without Naomi, and maybe that's why she took the pill. But the pill wouldn't sort it because cheating didn't do anything to Naomi, especially as she had no idea and didn't even know Claudia existed. But that doesn't make it right. Maybe it was that she had hurt Emily from day 1. Kissing her in secondary school. Changing Naomi's whole perception of life. Fucking her in the woods. Maybe it was Emily's fault, Naomi had to cheat. Emily sudden saw it from Naomi's viewpoint. Emily really had fucked Naomi up. And even if she hadn't meant to, and Naomi often told Emily that Emily was the best thing to ever happen to her, what if she was also the worst.

"I tried to kill myself, because, it all got to me. It all strafed to really affect me, and I hated it, and the guilt from kissing Claudia and then Hayley'."

"You kissed Hayley?"

"Yes."

"Can't really blame you, I had to restrain myself from jumping on the poor girl."

Emily didn't know what to think, and secretly neither did Naomi.

On impulse, at the sight of Emily looking Pale and distraught and vulnerable, Naomi grabbed Emily's head and pulled her into her for a kiss. Emily pulled back and stopped Naomi's advance. She looked down, followed the pattern of Naomi's tights up from her toe to her knee, and then to the top of her thigh. She stopped there and with her fingers trailed the pattern up from her knee to tight and then to stomach, never hesitant, it stopped on her heart.

"My heart beats for you Naomi. And that's why it hurt. But I do love you, and I never tell you, but I do. I'm just afraid.

"Afraid of what?"

"My feelings go stronger than just love Naomi, I want to think forward into the future. We are too stuck in the present."

"So, what? Marriage? You want to marry me?"

"I think I do."

•••••••••

"That's awkward."

"Why?" Emily was confused. She sat more upright.

"Because I don't ant to marry you."

"Why?" Emily became frustrated.

"Well, I just don't see the point. Why must we marry?"

Emily couldn't figure out why Naomi was doing this. What did she mean she didn't see the point, how could you not see the point?

"What? Don't you see a future between us two?"

"Yes, the future doesn't mean we have to get married, I want to spend the rest of my life with you, but I couldn't marry you. We would have to choose the last name. Emily Campbell doesn't really go."

Emily laughed.

"It would be my last name. Naomi Fitch, that goes. I like its ring."

"What ring? It sounds terrible. Either way, I don't want to marry you. I love you Emily but look how good both of our parents marriages worked out?"

Naomi swigged the Bacardi. Which was dangerously low on content now.

"We're not our parents. We are Naomi and Emily, Naomily. We can do what the fuck we want."

Naomi finished the bottle.

"Emily, you've just come out of a coma, we shouldn't be talking like this. If you imagining people up and having hallucinations doesn't make you crazy this does."

"You think I'm crazy." Naomi nodded.

"Babe, you fucked a girl that didn't exist and you tried to kill yourself because of hallucinations. You sound like a crazy bitch." Naomi laughed; the seriousness of the matter had vanished as Naomi slipped further and further into being off her face.

"We didn't fuck."

"But you wanted to."

Naomi laughed and tried to drink liquid that wasn't there, when the empty bottle didn't produce alcohol, Naomi jumped up and ran to find more.

"I know." Emily whispered to herself. She covered herself in the blankets and closed her eyes. A tear falling silently, un-noticed.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6, I've done everything I can. **

Emily clambered out of the double bed, her hand searching across the expanse of lilac sheets to reach onto the bedside table for her water. Last nights party still bangs in her head. Judging by the expanse of sheets and the non-existent smell of burnt toast, Naomi had not returned. A long sigh escaped Emily's red lips and hung in the air. She looked at the clock and registered 4am. Her hand rubbed her forehead as she dragged herself towards the dresser. The only thing covered her naked body, was the sticky residue of smoke from the cigarettes outside the club and sweat from dancing. Although not visible the grime made Emily feel and look disgusting.

Water burst from the shower in spurts, steadying into a flow. She leant into the water, cleaning herself; with every scrub she felt her mind easing. One finished she grabbed a clean towel and sat at the bottom of her bed, staring at her phone screen. No messages. She ruffled her hair dry with the towel and climbed back into the warm sheets, and buried her and her mind.

A lively Naomi slammed the front door shut, ruffled in the kitchen for half an hour and ran up the stairs. Emily peered out from the sheets and met eyes with the one she loved.

"Get up Emily; we're going camping," Naomi ordered with a smile, pulling the sheets off of Emily. She folded them neatly and then chucked them onto the floor.

"I think you're now the crazy one, its half 4 in the morning."

"Well its 12 noon somewhere in the world, get up; I want to watch the sun rise!" Naomi stomped out of the room for Emily to get dressed. A loud yawn escaped Emily's mouth and she followed the orders, however slowly.

Emily took Naomi's hand as if for the last time, swinging gently as they walked out of the front door, down the path and out of the gate. It was dark, barely 4.45am, only lit by the fading moonlight. Naomi stopped a second;

"We didn't forget anything did we? Alcohol? Ham?"

"I love your priorities." Emily giggled; she kissed Naomi's cheek and finished; "I'll check." Naomi held the picnic hamper on her knee whilst Emily flipped opened the belt buckles securing the lid shut. In the basket she found, croissants, butter knifes, jams, ham, vodka (as usual), a few bottle of red wine, bread rolls, cakes of sorts, nutella and cream spray. Emily didn't quite know the real reason for the spray cream, she smiled to herself; she had an idea.

"All there." Emily secured the lid shut and stared at Naomi's big blue eyes. Naomi didn't respond, she just tapped her chin and then after an awkward silence smiled to herself proudly.

"I just realised I'm taking a crazy girl to sleep under the stars alone with a glass bottle of vodka and knifes."

"Well I'll try not to kill you with the jams and butter knifes, even if I am a crazy bitch."

Naomi smiled and walked off, taking Emily with a start. She chucked the picnic hamper carelessly on the back of the moped. Emily started the ignition and Naomi sat behind.

"Safety first." Naomi ordered with a laugh, they pulled their helmets over their face and secured the straps. Emily started and pushed forward.

The orange sun echoes its beams delicately over the golden crisp hills, folding like waves over one an other. A stream wound its way through the valley, directing large groups of trees to curve. Deep orange, turned to pale pink, which found at its edge a light blue, as the rising sun opened itself up to Naomi and Emily.

"Isn't it beautiful, Emily?" Naomi tightened her grasp of Emily's hand. Letting go at last minute to run down the slope to the edge of a woods. At the edge she waved for Emily to follow and clambered inside. Emily stood there for a moment, a sudden rush of warmth came over her as she took one last glace at the rising sun, before running into the dark abyss of the woods. She remembered the Picnic hamper at last minute, and told Naomi to go on without her. She ran back and forth to collect it. On re-entering the woods she had to push various branches and twigs out of the way.

On the other side she was faced with a more complicated miss mash of twigs and branches, the occasional spider's web. Emily wiped a web aside and followed the blonde colour ahead of her. She smiled at Naomi who briefly looked back to check up on her. She looked at her clothes which to her surprise were relatively clean, having gone through mud and tree branches. On looking back up she caught a glance of Black shooting past her. The picnic hamper slipped slightly in her grasp. She caught it quickly, adjusted her hair with her free hand and breathed.

"She's not real." Emily reassured herself. She heard Naomi call her name in the distance, she replied with a simple yes and Naomi continued on.

"You think I'm not real? I'm hurt." Claudia emerged from around a tree, wearing this time a black dress top with a satanic cross printed in white across her breast. Her leggings hugged her slender legs tightly and ruffled near the top of her dark Dr Martens. Just as Emily thought she would look.

"You're not." Emily pushed forward once more with the same pace. Claudia walked beside her moving branches with ease and grace, as if they were no inconvenience at all. Emily sighed with annoyance and trudged faster. The hamper slipped slightly from her arms. The vodka was weighing her down. Knowing Naomi if she had the hamper, she would have drank the liquid to save weight. But she was not Naomi. Claudia noticed the slipping and attempted to grab the hamper for support

"Go away!" Emily commanded. Claudia stepped back, arms raised in surrender. When Emily continued fighting her way through the tree's, she lit a cigarette. The light rattled Emily for even in her mind the light was so real. Emily lost her footing ever so slightly and recovered by holding a branch. She looked back up and Claudia was gone. With a sigh, Emily found a clearing and ran in the general direction of Naomi, hamper only just an inconvenience. The floor was littered with new life, shoots of green springing up out of the earth; tree's regaining their leaves once more after the harsh winter. Emily stood for a moment and admired the new life, thinking to herself how beautiful and wonderful it really all was. A branch snapped behind her. She turned quickly. Naomi smiled and laughed at Emily's shocked face. Without a word she walked forward once more, the tree branches now thinning, until their reached a dry grassy bay, with little to no tree cover, a perfect view of the sun set and sun rise. Emily then noticed Naomi's big rucksack, which she hoped contained at least a blanket.

"I thought I lost you for a moment, I thought maybe you met some more invisible friends and ran off with them or something." Naomi winked, the words hit Emily hard, and all she could manage was a nervous smile. Naomi dropped the rucksack with a thump to the ground, Emily followed with the hamper.

"Not many invisible friends, just a few. But they had beards and were really gross, so I had to come back to you." Emily found comfort in the words and settled with a big grin. "What are the plans for the day anyway?" Naomi stretched herself, her top rising slightly to reveal her toned and slightly tanned stomach. Emily bit her lip.

"Well I thought we could hunt for our food or something, I brought a bow…" _A bow? Why?_ "I've been practicing a lot recently." _Since when?_ Emily thought. "I used to do it a lot, there was this guy in our house obsessed with bows and old fashioned hunting, and he taught me some stuff." Naomi pulled from the rucksack a packaged bow, made simply of a finished wood, gently crafted into a curve with a thin wire running between the two. This was an expensive bow, for Naomi, but not the best. "I mean it isn't he best or anything, and I am not that good, I just thought I could teach you what I know?"

Emily got excited at the idea and ran over to see the bow. Naomi wondered off to the woods, taking a sheath of feathered arrows. Emily looked back at the stuff in wonder before going back into the woods.

"Ok first things first, you have to be silent, I don't mean walk quietly, I mean everything, your breathing your thoughts, your feet. Be aware of everything but act as though you are nothing more than the wind. Only carrying a bow and with then intention of killing something." Naomi stopped and motioned towards a bird perched silently on a branch around 10 meters way. Naomi pulled out an arrow and placed it on the wire, on rising the bow, she accidently let go of the arrow too soon and it fell 3 meters short. The bird didn't move at first, as though mocking us and then briskly flew away.

"Wow, I didn't know you were so good, please teach me." Emily joked, and walked on a bit into another clearing with a small pond centralised. Naomi stopped Emily and waited at the edge behind a bush for an animal to take water. She steadied the bow with another arrow, this time not letting go, the bow was on full tension when a small rabbit hopped its way to its death. The arrow shot through the air and punctured the Rabbits leg. Naomi jumped up in triumph and ran towards her kill. Emily stared as she did so, and mock clapped.

"See, im not that bad." The rabbit gave its last reflex and died instantly. "Your turn." Naomi handed the bow to Emily. Emily held the bow in her right hand and flexed the wire with her left. "Wrong, it's the other way around, your strongest hand on the wire; your left should hold the frame." Naomi stood behind Emily, her waist to Emily's back. Naomi placed her body align with Emily's and clasped her hand over the others. Emily froze with excitement.

"Look, when you aim look to where to arrow will hit, by looking down the arrow itself, lift it a little higher depending on distance. The farther the target the higher the arrow, unless its ages away and you would shoot vertical, you would miss regardless of skill level." Naomi giggled and moved Emily's finger gently to alter her position on the frame. Emily felt Naomi's body pressing against her own, warm. A layer or two apart "On finger above the arrow and the others for support underneath." Emily stopped paying attention to the instructions and focused on how Naomi's breath brushed past her neck, electrifying her senses. She stared at Naomi's lips moving with the words about a subject she didn't care for. She licked her own lips and was about to kiss, when Naomi stopped talking and let go.

"And that's all you really need to know, now shoot that tree branch with the green moss across the clearing."

Emily noted it was about 5 metres away and wouldn't be too hard. She pulled back the wire and released. The arrow feebly flopped to the ground and landed by her toe. She smiled at Naomi, who gave a childishly disappointed look.

"I'm not so good at it." Emily laughed, and stared at Naomi's lips once more; they were coated in a fine red, and smudged with gloss.

"You'll get it. Give it time; we have as long as we want." Emily's mind flicked back to her moped chained to a wooden fence that could easily be taken off; to the hamper and rucksack carelessly left in the clearing.

"We should get back to our stuff." Emily asked, Naomi. Who then smiled and replied.

"Not until you shoot something decent." Emily smiled, grabbed another arrow from the sheath, attached it to the wire, and with one swift movement pierced the eye of a big bird flying above. It fell with a thud onto the edge of the pond. She retrieved the arrow and bird. Without looking in Naomi's astonished eyes she wondered back to the clearing with a smug grin.

At the clearing, Naomi had set a thick red blanket out onto the grass, placed the hamper on the corner and a few stones to secure it from the breeze. These were unnecessary but to Naomi vital to survival. Naomi lay on the blanket on her side, one arm supporting her, the other swinging a bottle of red wine. She flipped off her shoes. Emily copied.

"Care for a drink, Ems?" Naomi pushed open the cork and swigged

"Naomi, its half 10 in the morning, it's a little early to drink don't you think." Emily's voice was a little more husky and allured Naomi even more.

"Its 4 o'clock somewhere in the world." With those words Emily sat herself down on the floor, legs bent beneath her. She took the bottle from Naomi and swigged. Quickly she spat the fluid onto the grass beside her.

"What the hell, that's revolting." Emily spat out onto the grass, Naomi took back the wine and swigged.

"Its wine is it not? I brought it from a 24 hour Aldi on the way home; it's not going to be perfect on a £4 budget." Emily dismissed the taste and swigged herself. She took more and more, until Naomi stopped her.

"Steady on Ems, don't want you getting too plastered, after all its only half 10." Naomi winked and swigged. Emily was handed the bottle but put it aside, she wiped the wine from her lips and pushed her self forward, Naomi sat up to meet her lips which pushed together with such a force Naomi was on her back. Emily pushed Naomi's hand to their sides, briefly looked her in the eyes and then kissed. Naomi didn't let go, instead she pulled Emily into her, her hand grabbing her head, her other working its was across her back, down to her thigh. She slowly pulled Emily's top up her back to her arms. Emily only paused briefly to rip the t-shirt off before passionately kissing once more. With each kiss she pulled her mouth in to a smile and her hands worked on Naomi's chest. Her fingers tracing the hem of her t-shirt, gently pulling it up and pushing her hand under. The coldness made Naomi shudder before she registered she liked it. Emily's hand paused on Naomi's chest and then working its way back down to her stomach. Naomi caressed the others back, he hands wild from enjoyment. Emily pulled back from kissing, not making eye contact before ripping Naomi's top off and chucking it to the side by her own. They both lay topless in their bras on the red blanket moving with each other. Emily paused at the button of Naomi's skinny jeans before moving quickly around her hips to her back and pulling her up, they sat legs intertwined kissing. Emily playing with Naomi's blonde hair, pulling occasionally while her other pulled her back closer. She needed to find skin, to make contact with Naomi, to feel her warm touch against her body. Naomi paused kissing and rested her forehead on Emily's chin, her hands trying to undo Emily's trousers. In the rest, Emily opened her eyes to scan the clearing, nothing. She closed her eyes as Naomi's warm hands finished the button and gentle unzipped them. She opened her eyes again; Claudia sat just behind the hamper, on the grass, smiling and lighting a cigarette. Emily suddenly flipped Naomi around so Naomi was on top of her. Naomi liked the dominance and kissed Emily hard, her hands pulling down Emily's trousers slowly. Emily stared into the sky, and as far as she could behind her. Claudia still sat smoking her cigarette smiling and boring into her soul.

"No." Emily whispered. Naomi stopped herself and looked at Emily confused. "No. me." Emily again flipped Naomi onto the floor; she kicked her trousers off to the floor. Naomi was confused but continued kissing. She worked her way across Emily's hair, grabbing strands and pulling her closer, Emily was laid on her now, moving gently from kisses. Naomi's hand slowly glided down her back and to the rim of her trousers. She moved her hand under Emily's stomach between the too and under Emily's knickers. Emily looked up a final time, and saw Claudia standing above her staring, laughing. She flew off of Naomi and shielded her eyes. Without looking she pulled her trousers back on and felt for her top. Naomi laid there facing the sky, confused. She stared at Emily, her hands covering her face, left it to her craziness and began to drink again. Emily fell to sleep.

Naomi covered Emily with her own t-shirt and put the cork back in the wine bottle for keeps. She sat there for a moment. _What had the either of them done to deserve this?_ She grabbed her bow and the dead bird, chucked the warm rabbit and bird into the brush and set out to hunt. On entering the woods, there was a dull silence, unlike the natural hum of a woodland area. The animals were not stirring. She set up target marked with moss on trees balanced at different distances and shot. The first target at 10 meters her aim was too high. The second was a 50 pence away from bulls eye. She prided herself on her achievement, and attempted to shoot her second arrow into a split. She aimed, as she let go of the bow she heard a cry. She quickly collected her two arrows and ran back to the clearing. Emily was talking to herself, shaking in the middle of the red blanket. Naomi was too far away to get there quickly; she wanted to see what happens to Emily. She silently edged towards her with a hunters step.

Emily swayed back and forth, her hands holding her arms.

"I told you to go away, why won't you leave me alone?" Emily asked Claudia, who knelt beside Emily and blew smoke into her face. Emily coughed.

"I can't go away until you let me." Claudia replied in a tone to suggest it was obvious. She rubbed Emily's back reassuringly.

"And how do I let you go exactly?" Emily peered up into Claudia's dark eyes. She smiled. Claudia stood up, looked towards the other side of the clearing. She saw nothing unnatural.

"Don't worry yet, just try and sort things out, maybe actually fuck your girlfriend for once. I don't know, you're a messed up kid." Claudia took one last look towards the trees before walking away and out of sight. Before Emily could usher a goodbye, Naomi stepped out of the tree line where Claudia has disappeared. She smiled nervously before looking at the bottle of wine.

"Its 1 o'clock, does that means its ok to drink now?" Emily asked, although she didn't need an answer she took the bottle and glugged, before wiping her mouth and replacing the cork.

"You ok?" Naomi bent next to Emily, sat on the balls of her feet and tilted Emily's chin to meet her face. Emily smiled a genuine smile; her eyes bore into Naomi's for a moment and then floated away following an invisible object, and focusing her attention at a far off distance. Naomi kissed her lips. Emily pulled her on top of her and kissed her face repeatedly without thinking. Naomi pulled off ad sat by her side.

"Emily I'm worried about you. I fought so hard for you to come back and now you are, you are strange. You're not your old self. It's as though you're not here and then suddenly you whip back to being yourself. You're a mind fuck you know that. What ever you're on, I want some." Naomi giggled, and lay beside Emily who was just lying staring at a distance point in the sky.

"I'm on the moon." Was all Emily said after a silence. Naomi moved her head to face Emily, who too turned to face her.

"Do you still love me Emily?" Naomi didn't smile.

"Yes." Emily said and stared back into Naomi's eyes.

"Promise?"

"I promise. Do you love me?" Emily asked. Naomi thought for a moment, and as though there was never a hesitation said;

"I will love you till the end of time." Emily turned to face the sky.

"When's the end of time?"

Naomi hadn't moved, she stared at Emily's face. Taking in the soft features, her eye lashes pushing forward, her nose sloping into a button, her lips, plump and red. Emily had lost a lot of weight since the accident, she was wasting away. Physically and mentally.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7, The Hunter**

Yellow, like fire; broke through the gap between Naomi's two eye lids. They retracted before opening again and bracing for the warm sting that accompanied waking up after sleep. Naomi wiped her eye free from tired, and sat up. The sky was a pale cloudless blue. Nearing the East a brilliant yellow orb slowly rose over the hills. The darkness receding to be replaced by luscious green, dots of white daisy's and yellow flowers. Sheep slowly stood and graced gracefully upon the grass. Naomi stared at the scene unfolding, thinking how beautiful it was. _Not as beautiful as Emily –_ Naomi thought quickly and turned to her left. She lay back down on her side, staring at Emily's back, how her red hair waved down to mid shoulder. How it seemed to spray like fire lapping in spikes. Although Emily's hair was not spiky, it was soft, soft as silk and just as beautiful. Naomi's hand crawled, finger by finger over to the edge of Emily's back. The hand wavered over her body, before settling gentle on her head. Soft, gentle movements down and up caused Emily's head to turn away slightly. Naomi pulled back. Then on return slowly moved further down her hair to tips, holding one she felt its softness, caressing her fingers into it. She stopped and placed her arm over the dip in Emily's side, and clung on to cuddle. Emily's arm instinctually held on to Naomi's and she moved into the Naomi's shape.

Her mind wondered back to when she first really knew Emily. Or what she thought was Emily, where her feelings were felt back. She smiled to herself eyes closed and immersed herself in the sweet smelling hair on Emily's head.

On that day, years ago Emily had kissed Naomi. For whatever immature reason this was a pivotal moment in their lives, which possibly changed them forever. From that day Katie, Emily's twin sister had told everyone Naomi jumped Emily. Emily knew this wasn't true, but could not stand up to her sister.

Naomi frowned slightly.

She had never really known why Emily never stood up to Katie. Sibling instinct? One must be more dominant then the other. Naomi didn't have that problem she was an only child. Only on paper of course, for all of the people that lived with them, Naomi was not the only child there.

Her mind wondered back to seeing her mother in the kitchen door way, holding a small child, trying to feed them, and she didn't even know its name.

Naomi smiled.

It was funny; her growing up.

In reality, she was still laid next to Emily, her face buried in Emily's hair. Emily dead to the world laid in her own mind. _What are you thinking about, Em?_ Often that was the main phrase of her mind, what was going on in there. Did she think of Naomi, or someone else? Was Emily smiling in her sleep due to Naomi in her dream or something else? Of course it was stupid to think that Naomi, being one human being could be the only cause of happiness in her girlfriend's life. But she wanted to at least be part of it. _What do I think about?_ Naomi was stumped. She didn't constantly think of Emily, she liked to think she did, endless fantasy's late at night alone in her bed, before their relationship. But this time Emily was around to fulfil the fantasy and so her thoughts didn't need to be consumed also. Was the flame dying out? Did she still love Emily?

Dazed, dizzy and darling, Emily opened her eyes. Unaffected by the sudden change in lighting her arms pushed up to a sitting position. She sat emotionless for a moment, adjusting herself. The shock came when there was no Naomi. _Where had she gone?_ Emily got up, grabbed the bow and a sheath of arrows and set out into the woods. The first thing she saw was a small bird and it wasn't worth the effort to shoot and collect it. She wondered, half asleep through the brush, pushing small branches aside as she did. In intervals the birds tweeted, alerting their friends of Emily's appearance.

"Fuck off?" Emily whispered into the seemingly empty canopy. As she walked her thoughts wondered over her life; her family, her sister brother, mum and dad. Her dad was the most strange of the family and she loved him for it. Always trying to keep fit, doing the families head it. It did get annoying but she loved him. It's a shame none of his freaky fitness traits rubbed off on her. She was already out of breath having walked half a mile at a steady pace. She rested for a small moment, against a tree and slipped into her head. Just for a moment, she saw black. It flashed across her sight. For that moment she couldn't breath. Suddenly gasping she filled her lungs with air. Her hand shot out for the supporting tree as she fell, but was instead caught by a hand. A warm hand, she looked up to see Naomi. But was met by bright green eyes. Claudia's eyes. These eyes bore deep into Emily, they filled her head and swam down her body through her chest, her arms, her stomach and stopped. She looked away. And began to run. A flash of black and Claudia was running too. Emily pulled her bow up to shoot and loaded an arrow. An arrow blazed through the air and straight into Claudia's head. For a moment Claudia stood silently, and then a trickle of blood rolled down her pale fore head. She fell back onto the floor at the base of a tree. Emily stood staring in disbelief. Frozen to the spot she watched at the blood oozed at fast rates until it was streaming down. Without hesitation she lunged forward and grabbed Claudia's shoulders and shook her. Claudia's eyes opened in a burst and she swung forward and kissed Emily. Emily shot back, a smudge of blood covering her cheek, she touched the blood, and it was very real. She ran, dropping the bow and smashed through the shrubbery and out of sight. The bow sat silently by the side of an arrow, the loaded arrow which never left the string flicked out and settled beside it.

Naomi exited the woodland and walked elegantly back to the picnic blanket. A bad feeling crept into her mind; she quickly expelled it as she approached the area. She laid down her collection of berries. She sat down on the sun warm blanket and closed her eyes, briefly. Day dreaming about Emily, and where she was. That sinking feeling snuck back to the front of her mind. On sitting up she turned to her front and played with blades of grass that snuck them selves up from under the blanket. It snapped at her pull and it feel to her rounded palm. The feeling crawled back. She stood up and stretched out. _Where was Emily?_ Naomi saw newly flattened grass and followed the small footprints deeper into the woods.

Emily stopped, out of breath and fell to the floor. She couldn't think,

_She didn't know what to do, she couldn't control it anymore, and it just sort of took over. The instinct, raw and passionate, it was survival. She grabbed Naomi's head and pulled it closer to her own, and her lips clung to Naomi's. Naomi resisted at first, and then understood. Her hands pulled in Emily's body and the two were inseparable. __This was ok, this was natural.__ Thoughts of Naomi and her body clouded Emily's thoughts, nothing could enter, nothing to break her away. Suddenly the only thing she wanted, the one thing that could keep her alive, her life support, was Naomi and she need her every inch. _

She hit her head. This was real, she didn't need this. She was fine. The sexual frustration hit home. This was highly inappropriate. She hit herself around the face. If Claudia were to appear, she would choose to when she thought of Naomi, she couldn't do this. She tried to think that when she got back she would give Naomi what she wanted. But Naomi was the one causing the pain. _Gahhh_ it was all going mental. She couldn't think straight, bits of her pulling her apart. One part of her wanted to go back to the picnic, pin Naomi against the floor and fuck her. Another (the sane part) wanted to run the hell away, sort her life out and then return, to Naomi and then it would be ok, she wouldn't have to worry about Claudia and fucking up again. The final part of her wanted to sit her, torn between the two, for the hell of it

_She ripped off Naomi's t-shirt; the need to feel her skin, to sense the heat radiating off of it, to connect. Her hands grabbed Naomi's and controlled them, she lead them to the hem of her t-shirt. Naomi knew. It was off in a second, the cool air hitting Emily like an ice pool. She grabbed Naomi, her legs around her own waist and pushed her against the wall. Her skin was so soft, so fragile, she wanted own it, to control it. She needed it. _

_Stop! _Emily got up and paced around the tree, shaking her head as the memory tried to repeat itself. Flashes of black fought against images of passion. Two horrible comparisons. At the flash of black she closed her eyes, and pretended it was just a blink, natural. At the memory, she paced further. There was no real reason she needed to expel the memory she just wasn't ready, this wasn't right, this was not the place.

Claudia jumped out from her mind and Emily fell to the floor. He knees bent to get up, but she couldn't, some force was holding her down.

_Emily's kiss was stronger, unrelenting and aggressive. Naomi liked it, her hands under Emily's arms. Emily's hands went behind Naomi's back and to the strap. With a tug she couldn't get it off._

_"Fucking hell, every time!" Emily complained and carried on. Naomi dropped from the wall and turned the tables pinning Emily against the wall. Emily stopped kissing and her arms were above her head, her breathing heavy. She stared into Naomi's eyes, wanting, yearning for some more, pleading almost._

"Look, I'm not here to destroy you! You are destroying yourself! Just listen-"Emily was struggling against Claudia's grip. Pleading to be let go. "Listen!"

"No! Please just let go, leave me alone! Why won't you go away?" Emily cried, she stopped struggling and closed her eyes, sobbing into the cool mid afternoon air. On opening Claudia was gone. She was alone.

Naomi bent down to retrieve the bow and loose arrows. Her hand fumbled along the handle to check for warmth. It was cold. She was long gone. She checked the arrows, one was missing; she scouted the area in search and found it strew in a pile of weeds a few feet away. _What the hell happened?_ Naomi noticed the ragged tree branches to her right; it looked as though someone had run through. She followed.

_Naomi's left hadn't went behind the small of Emily's back, the other cradling Emily's neck, pulling her in for more. Pushing her body right into Naomi's trying to get so much of her at once. Emily's hands still positioned on the wall, fell to Naomi's head and slid down her hair, to her shoulders, sliding gently to her fore arm, to her chest, hovering and then going further down her body. She couldn't handle it, this need to have Naomi, a hunger, it was as if all her life she has been waiting for this moment and now she's in it, all she wants is more. More of this feeling, more of the intensity, more of the lust and raw passion._

No! Emily shut her eyes! Jumped up and ran back the way she came, trying to find salvation at the picnic blanket. The only place she could think of that was like home, that reminded her of the old times, that reminded her of-

Naomi was hit and fell straight to the floor, she couldn't move some force was holding her down, when she opened her eyes Emily was shaking, and dried tears had cleaned the thin layer of dirt on her face. Naomi instinctively grabbed Emily, no matter what happened she was here and they were safe. Emily sobbed into Naomi's shoulder.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8, over the edge. **

The lights flashed bright against the shell of the black limacine. The paparazzi swarmed around the door, one an even jumped on the car before being pulled down by security. Guards pushed the photographers aside to make way for the singer to get out of the car. The crowd were electric with anticipation, Emily held Naomi around the waist, pushing herself slightly higher to see over the crowd.

"Lana!" was shouted all over the place, it gave Emily a head ache. Emily clutched Naomi's arm as the car door opened, they watched to see the singer step out and into the walk way. First to be seen was her extravagant brown hair, followed by her sculpted face and pouty lips. Naomi started to scream and cheer. She stepped out and smiled at the cameras. Naomi smiled at Emily and cheered with the rest of the fans, Emily's grip on Naomi's waist loosened so she could plant a hard kiss on the side of Naomi's face. The pair were lined up outside the venue waiting to go in; other groups and singers were also playing that night, such diverse genre's from hardcore rock to rap to grunge; the queue was massive. Naomi hoped half of the drunken rabble would be refused access. Lana greeted the crowd with a blown kiss and the paparazzi went wild for her, following her every movement with the shutter of their cameras. Naomi thought it was all about fake, no one really liked Lana's voice, it was just because she was the new shiny play toy and was controversial to how things were supposed to be. Plus she was banging the lead singer of 'Kassidy' for extra publicity. Although Emily seemed to be drawn in by Lana's diamond eyes and soft new Yorker voice, which is a bad thing to say as the new Yorker accent is far from soft. Lana walked up the path nearer to the door, and stopped briefly and looked right into Emily's eyes. Emily beamed to Naomi and ran up for an autograph.

"Get back in line, or you'll loose your place!" the security yelled to the pair, the drunkards were already closing in on the newly exposed position. Emily let go of Naomi and ran forward

"Keep the space!" Emily called back to Naomi. Naomi fought off drunken yobs and regained their space. Emily pushed forward with her pad and pen, she got to the gate with a push and the guard halted her by pushing his hand against her shoulder.

"Lana!" Emily shouted, sounding just like the paparazzi. Lana smiled and waved, but was ushered into the venue and out of sight. Emily stared at the door, she kept staring and turned back to find Naomi. Naomi had gone in too, the queue was mostly inside the doors, and thankfully Naomi had given Emily her ticket earlier.

The crowd had already filled the first row and Naomi was no where in sight. Emily managed to push forward under a few very tall males' arms to the front, pushed very hard against a barrier. Lights flashed before her eyes and heavy bass music kicked in, the room was getting more and more packed. Banners inscribed with the words 'LANA DEL REY'. People screamed everywhere and it made Emily's head pound, _the worst place she could possibly be with a hangover._ She didn't care, she screamed along with the crowd, which now had taken up the whole room. The venue was not big, it was very small, only 400 people could fit in and it was very cramped. The stage staffs were frantically running about the stage adjusting microphones, drums sets, turning guitars and key boards. It vibrated; the whole scene shook in her eyes, her hands shook, her body seemed cold all of a sudden. She couldn't explain it and it made her heart skip a beat, her pulse speed and her breathing heavy. In that moment Lana Del Rey waltzed onto the stage with her team and it blacked out. Naomi hugged her from behind and Emily glanced at her, brown connecting to blue. Naomi screamed in Emily's ear and her girlfriend grinned back at her screaming too. The drum started and Lana's first song burst into existence. Emily jumped about in excitement holding onto Naomi's hand tightly, as Naomi began jumping too. Their hands fell apart as Lana walked the stage, clinging onto her microphone and wrapping the wire around her arms with her other hand, she smiled to the crowd in between words. Everyone in the room was dancing and enjoying the music. Lana's on stage presence wasn't overwhelming and so large chunks of the crowd were at the side bars, and holding conversations. Suddenly the crowd departed around Emily and she was standing alone the spotlight on her and she could see nothing outside. She felt a gasp from all around her and she was pulled forward. Before she escaped the spotlight a dark figure ran past her and knocked her off balance. She rose back up and caught the hands that lead her. Bright light suddenly turned into darkness, as her eyes adjusted she saw a silhouette. Long dark brown hair, made up high on the top of the head lead down to a highly sculpted face and big red defined lips were creased into a brilliant smile…Emily realised what or rather who she was looking at after the person had taken her through a door into a brightly lit room. Lana sat down on her stool and stared into the mirror; she gently combed her silky hair with a brush and hummed to herself. Emily stood there staring, frozen in disbelief, her feet wouldn't move at all, frightened.

"I said you can sit down" Lana laughed to herself and ushered Emily to a seat behind her on a sofa big enough for two. White fabric patterned with gold embroidered flowers, strewn with a silk throw over cushioned Emily as she first sat down onto the edge of the seat. _What was she doing here?_ Emily played with her hands and one fell to her arm for comfort. Lana said nothing but hummed to herself on her stool. The room glowed orange in the chandelier light, it sparkled over the floor and created a strange dreamlike pattern. Emily stared at the intricate windings of the pattern, how it seemed to flow like water against the rugged floor, how the light clarified detailed pieced of the wood underneath the rug, flowing like the grain. A dark shadow fell over the light and Emily snapped out of the trance it had put her in, she looked up dazed and confused as to what had caused it. Lana had moved from her stool and had come to sit next to Emily. _What the hell_. Emily pinched herself gently and it felt too real. The lights were a little too bright; Lana's face was a little too perfect. Something was up. This wasn't real.

"It is real darling." Lana said. In her hands had appeared two glasses of a liquid substance that was most probably cheap bubbly from the corner shop outside of the venue… the venue, she was still at a concert. Or was she. She didn't remember how she had got there, had the concert ended? If so where was Naomi and why wasn't she in the room with her now, this magical experience. Although it didn't really feel magical, it felt surreal, but not in its entirety out of place. Emily looked to Lana's face; her lipstick had move to a deep red and her eyes had been covered in a thick layer of liquid eye liner which at the ends flickered up wards. Blush and foundation covered her skin; It didn't look tacky, in fact it was really well done although it was obviously meant for the paparazzi who, when computerised would edit the photos. Emily took the drink from Lana's hand, skin briefly touching, at the touch Emily brought her hand back and almost spilled her drink. Lana didn't make it obvious that she noticed and just sipped her drink.

"Did you enjoy the concert?" Lana asked, and took a sip of her drink, never breaking eye contact. At the end of her sip her lip curled upwards into a smile as she licked them dry.

"It was..." Emily didn't actually remember, she could only bring about the memory of the first part before she… "I was unforgettable" Emily lied. She took a sharp sip of her drink and held it with both hands, her insecurities biting at her.

"I mean, it wasn't my best, and the mic wasn't checked properly at the beginning so that whole drama with the stage guys… but, well I mean I didn't mess it up. I hope you don't mind the drink is non-alcoholic." Emily looked down at her now empty glass; she had drunk it to calm her nerves. "I just don't drink much alcohol, haven't since I was 18. I smoke though." She pulled out a fag from a little white box she had on her lap, from a lighter a flame lit the end and she breathed. Smoke blew gently from her mouth as she exhaled.

"This is gonna sound weird, but how the fuck did I get here? No offence, I love your music and all but I don't really... remember?" Emily asked, she looked down at her glass and it was full again. Could someone have filled it without her knowing?

"Well you jumped up on stage and danced and hugged me, at first I thought you were high and told you to back off, and I got security, and then backstage when you released we bumped into each other and you were talking about being lost and we ended up here?" Lana seemed as though she was hiding something, like something was there on the edge of her tongue and she wanted it to be heard but knew not to tell. She liked her lips and looked nervously from side to side, she smiled a little before looking up and in a stutter staying;

"You are pretty hot." This took Emily back. _What the actual fuck?_

"Wait, what?" Emily asked. She was flattered and everything but there was drama enough already and this whole thing was surreal. Lana blinked and dropped her class off the arm of the sofa to the floor and lunged forward, pinning Emily against her back, attempting to kiss her. Emily pushed her back, her arms trying hard enough so that their lips did not touch. In that moment the door crashed open and a really tall black male fell into the room, his red supreme flat peak fell to the floor. Playful shouts from outside the door sounded and a crowd of smaller individuals ran past. Lana shot back from Emily and adjusted herself into a respectable position. The man groaned and attempted to get back up, he rose to his right arm and the other wrapped around his stomach.

"What the fuck!" Emily shouted and got up, she was about to run for the door when a final black man, slightly shorter with big lips ran into the room; his top was in tatters. He grabbed the man by the arm and screamed "Oh shit, Tyler's gonna throw up!" The man on the floor gagged and jumped up, he pushed the second man aside and grabbed the bottle of drink Lana had and ran out of the room. The evening was even more surreal than before. Lana shut the door and ran towards Emily with her arms trying to get around her. Emily evaded and ran to the other side of the room.

"I have a girlfriend!" Emily shouted. Lana didn't care she ran straight for her. As she made contact a shout was heard from behind her, followed by the door being crashed open again, this time Emily knew the person. Claudia ran forward and pulled Lana off of Emily; she pushed Lana on to the sofa and made her calm down. Emily was so confused by the situation that she just stood there against the wall and held her arm.

"Emily, this is not going to help it you need to do this to Naomi, what were you thinking?" Claudia shouted, she sat on the stall and stared with murder eyes at Lana.

"Wait. I am really fucking confused. I don't even, I cant... I don't know what he fuck is going on. Is this even real?" Emily asked, she ran forward and approached the door.

"Of course it's real! Look, just walk though that door and you'll see what is real and what isn't real." Claudia pointed to the door that Emily's hand was about to open, she hesitated. The situation was certainly not real, or was it? What was real? Her life recently wasn't exactly normal, she was in a coma and she had troubles… she hadn't seen her parents. Lana was behind her, at little too close behind her. As much as Emily really loved her music this was too personal.

"I am real." Lana whispered in Emily's ear. It made her think. She chanced it. She opened the door.

A cobbled walkway lead to an opening to a street, there was a very dim light that cascaded over a small bin, on which rubbish was overflowing the lid. In between the cobbles lay still water, just touched by the light, but only enough to show where the floor met the curb. Emily walked out onto the street and turned to look back to Claudia, the door was open but not to the scene she was familiar with. A small room with grey drab walls and only a small dark green box to fill it had replaced the dressing room. Emily was confused; she looked back and walked along the alley to the exit. The buildings were familiar but she didn't know where from. On walking out of the alley she noticed something frightening; the Bruges tower. It was had an almost omnipresence about her, towering and leaving her in its shadow. Her feet dragged as she walked forward, pulled by her curiosity and a force that compelled her to go to the top. The gates were opened but there was no reception worker to deal with or a metal boundary gate to keep her out. Two steps of walking and she jolted into an awkward run, half of her wanting to go back to find the concert and the other being pulled forward and up the tower. Half way up she looked out of a window, her sight covered by a new wooden panel. In a sort of trance she pursued her course up the stairs, step by step her heart accelerating driving her muscles to push her faster until she was in a full blown run, jumping steps just to get up to the top, that same curious force pushing her further. A light could be seen and she pushed forward one last time and jumped through the door to the tower roof. But it wasn't the roof it was just a drop, she had pushed herself over the ledge and into the air, a fog covering her sight she had no idea when the bottom would be. The fog whipped her face and her arms flared about trying to find something to catch to stop herself, her legs kicked to find ground, her stomach filled with butterflies as she fell further and further and further. A car horn sounded and her eyes shot open to find cars headlights as she hit the ground.

**Her eyes opened once more to find her arms secured around something soft and human. Her eyes open and she was holding Naomi, both laid down on the bed, or what seemed like a bed. When Emily got over that she had not hit the floor, her body relaxed its muscles and her mind absorbed the new scene and she was cuddling Naomi on the picnic blanket in the woods. As the scene adjusted so did the light, and suddenly the golden sun appeared and the scene illuminated with its glow. Emily let go of Naomi and sat up to rub her eyes. She was wearing a jumper and underwear, nothing more. On further inspection she was not where she expected, it was before they had got together as a couple, before they moved in together. She was by the lake, the night of the camp out with just Naomi. Often her mind came back to his scene in a dream, but it was always a different time, the blow backs the lake, when Naomi ran away… when Emily had woken up in the middle of the night and just watched Naomi sleep, how her chest rose and fell and how her face changed with her minds thoughts. This time it was the night again, but it was just before Naomi woke up to leave. Except this was different again, when she stood up she was still laid down. Or in other words Emily was just in the memory and not part of it, she stood over the scene watching her self holding Naomi. Naomi stirred and she woke up. Wind blew gently through the trees as a bird sang its morning chime. The fire had died out and its ash blew softly over the stones and leaves and hit Emily's foot. The memory Emily still lay down, un-stirred by the wind or presence of the real Emily. Naomi moved Emily's arms from around her and sensitively rose up and pulled her clothes back on and walked to her bike. She reached her bike and picked up it up with a crash, waking Emily from her sleep. The real Emily walked past Naomi to the lake to get a better view. Emily looked around and had lost her friend, she ran towards the lake and straight through the real Emily, although she didn't feel anything she felt a stir inside of her and the sadness returned which she had felt at the time of the memory all that time ago. Suddenly she was one with the memory Emily and she screamed to Naomi, **

"**Twice! You are going to leave me in my bed twice!" She yelled towards Naomi who had now got on her bike and was about to ride off. Emily shouted the rest of her argument before the memory faded into darkness.**

Complete darkness, it was just Emily on her own in… nothingness, her mind. She wasn't a being, in fact she couldn't see her hand or feel her body, she was inside her head. _What the fuck was going on? _It was time to figure it all out. _Who was Claudia?_ There was a girl in her class once in secondary school called Claudia, but she had blonde hair and no definition to her face, she had barely any neck and her nose always ran. So that could not be her. She knew one other Claudia, one that might make it all come together one that would make sense but she didn't dress the same. She always knew who Claudia was, and that is why she kissed her. But she _wasn't_ her Claudia.

Her Claudia had dark hair and beautiful emerald eyes yes, but she was kind and always helpful and she was in her tutor from year 7 until 11. Her Claudia wore light vintage clothing and always carried around her camera which was also vintage; although she wasn't a _vintage_ girl she just liked the camera. Her Claudia would meet Emily after every PE lesson to warm down and then always get changed together, which naturally would be a lesbians dream, but it wasn't like that back then. Emily did know that she liked girls, she didn't, and well she always tried to never think of Claudia in that way. Every Tuesday and Thursday after school they would meet up by the be shed and go for a walk and just talk a lot, about everything really, but mainly about Claudia's life…her parents split on her 15 birthday and after that her dad was a drunk and abused her; never sexually but she was abused. Often would she get changed after PE and Emily notice a new mark on her arm or her leg, of course Emily would question it, but Claudia always had an excuse, she used the fact that she did ballet and was clumsy. Which didn't go hand in hand.

**Wind whistled through Emily's brown hair as she held her arm that was rested on her black side bag. Winter, as usual never broke the promise that there would be long cold nights and that it would be dark at five in the evening. She checked her watch, it was exactly five, and Claudia should be out of her after school class by now. A cough escaped her mouth and she pulled her cardigan tighter around her chest, the cold was really starting to set in and her school uniform was not going to help her. Thoughts of the warmth of her home started to settle in her mind as she moved her feet about to keep warm. The clouds were rolling in for the night, a horrible grey colour glowed from the sky and everything seemed really dull. Footsteps could be heard around the bike shed to her left, light dance like footsteps. **

"**Claudia?" Emily spoke into the cold air, her breath showing like smoke. From around the corner of the wall a girl appeared, her hair was tied in a tight bun and she wore a vintage denim jacket over her leggings which were ended by boots. It was her average Tuesday night outfit. **

"**Hey Emily!" Claudia smiled her blush emphasised her large smile as she went in to tightly hug Emily, **

"**Hi." Emily replied. Emily's hand was still holding her arm, she moved it mid hug so she could hold her tighter, there was enough time as Claudia loved long hugs, she never had hugs. Emily's hand brushed Claudia's upper leg before it came around her waist and to the small of her back. At her touch Claudia's legs stiffened slightly, as if willing not to move to savour it. The hug finished and Claudia's smile grew bigger. **

"**How are you, you ok?" Claudia asked, she moved to walk away from the bike shed, but turned back and stared into Emily brown eyes. **

"…**I'm a little cold if im honest." Emily joked, Claudia laughed and winked and then pranced into a fast walk. Every Tuesday Emily and Claudia walked along the fields outside of town, along the power lines and they always ate dinner under one of the main pylons. It wasn't the most recommended place to eat dinner on a cold winter night, but it was where they could be alone and talk. **

"**Lets get moving then." Claudia called and this time didn't look back, Emily sighed at the sight of Claudia and jogged after her. **

Emily was back into the darkness, clouded over, in her mind. It still made no sense, why was Claudia now in her mind, always popping up in weird moments, following her, driving her crazy, putting her in a coma…

"**This is it then, no exams now, just, just the future." Claudia was standing opposite Emily outside of the bike sheds, students and their families walked past every now and again, now they were alone. The blazing sun beat down on the two at their crucial moment. **

"**Yes, these letters decide our future…" Emily bit her lip and Claudia stared at her, stared at her lip and bit her own. **

"**Let's do it." Claudia said, Emily was taken aback just for a moment and then realised that she was referencing the GCSE results and not what was going on in her mind. She giggled and began to tear the lip of her envelope. Claudia stared amused at her face and then she began tearing open her own letter, she pulled out the covering letter and tossed it aside to reveal the results. It took a while to absorb the information and then she smiled and cheered to herself. **

"**All A's!" Claudia cheered. "Well except one B in maths, but I hate maths." She laughed and looked around at the sky and twirled about. **

"**I got B's and a C in geography." Emily was really surprised she thought she fucked her GCSE's up. But that didn't matter because it wasn't really her results she cared about, she cared about Claudia's with the teenage life she had Emily was surprised that she managed to care for her drunkard father and study. Claudia heard Emily's results and leaped onto her right there outside the bike shed, her legs wrapped around Emily's waist. The wall let off a dull thud as Emily was pressed against it, Claudia wasn't heavy it was just more hot. Hot, which was a word Emily had never used to describe Claudia before but it seemed to fit. Their faces were two inches from each other; Claudia still had her giant grin all across her face. Emily bit her lip Claudia's grin faded and she stared into her eyes. Wind blew gently against the back of Claudia's pale shirt, and blew her perfume, Emily breathed in and it made her stomach feel funny, a good kind of funny. A feeling Emily hadn't felt before. Claudia kissed Emily really quickly and jumped down and walked away. Emily stood there in shock; her hands fell behind her back and against the wall. **

But that still wasn't anything. It didn't explain why Claudia would be in her head now, and how it was happening at all.

**Naomi walked around the corner of the bike shed and paused a moment when she saw her friend Emily against a wall in a trance. **

"**What's got your knickers in a twist, Fitch?" Naomi asked as she walked towards her. Emily snapped her head out of the trance and looked up at Naomi's face. **

"**Claudia, we…" Emily uttered.**

"**You what?... You always were a strange kid weren't you? Got any good results, all mine were C/B's…" Before Naomi could even finish her sentence properly Emily lunged forward and kissed Naomi on the lips. **The memory dissolved into black smoke before she could remember what happened.

The darkness returned but it wasn't like before this was different. She was herself, light started to break through and heavy base ruminated in her ear. A white light broke through her vision and a face started to appear, pale and beautiful. A face that only had lips, the light shone brighter to reveal a nose and the bottoms of eyes and then she realised who it was. The scene came together in a moment and she was in Naomi's arms, a crowd of people surrounding her, Lana Del Rey on the stage singing her song, the lyrics 'Born to die' resonated in the room.

"Emily, are you ok?" Naomi shouted over the music. Emily got her footing again, she stood up right and Naomi's hand fell to her hips, she liked her hands being there.

"I'm, fine. I just got a little light headed."

"You do really scare me you know that. I have to put up with a lot." There was a deeper meaning to Naomi's last words, but she didn't know what.

"What?" Emily asked Naomi, she couldn't hear her though and so smiled and looked at Lana. _What did she mean though? _Yes, she understood the fact that she had tried to commit suicide, but not death, she was killing her memory. And the fact that she was in a comma and then going crazy. But she wasn't crazy that wasn't it. She wasn't.

Naomi stared at Emily as her face was contorted which normally mean that she was thinking. Naomi jumped about to the music and swayed, some man to her left was carrying a large beer and managed o spill half of it down over his chest, it didn't matter though he was already drunk. Lana walked about the stage in her usual non-committal way, she was singing but nothing more. Her on stage presence was nothing more than average, the lyrics were really good and that was the only part Naomi enjoyed about the woman. Words that could stir such emotion, they meant something to her; she could relate. Naomi swayed to the introduction of one of Lana's slower songs, she looked towards Emily, who had stopped moving and was just standing, eyes closed.

"Are you sure you are ok?" Naomi asked, she too stopped jumping and held Emily's arm gently, begging for the truth instead of her lies.

"I just feel light headed I need to get out of here." Emily walked out towards the door.

"Should I come…" Naomi was asking but Emily was soon out of her sight, she couldn't hear her over the music. Naomi stood there lost for words, as her red hair was soon swarmed and she had gone.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9, Claudia.**

Sizzling filled the dry air. Electricity fizzed along the four giant wires of the mains pylon in the field. Rough harvested patches of old corn lay ruffled on the ground, gently stirred by the summer breeze. Baby blue sky was pure without a single cloud in sight for miles; it was only spoiled by a pair of crows soaring high in the sky. Emily moved her book to the side just scrapping Claudia's bare leg, at her touch Claudia crossed her head to snap out of her daydream. She smiled out at Emily and un-curled her leg to lie down on her back. Emily scrunched her eyes to see through the blaring sunlight which was reflected off of a small make-up mirror in Claudia's bag. Squawking came from the sky above as the two birds clashed for a moment and then continued chasing each other in the high sky. Emily picked up her book and lay down a foot away from Claudia, their heads at the same height. She placed her book on her face to shade herself from the sunlight. Shuffling could be heard from her left and a boy appeared from the brush, he stood over Claudia and cast a dark shadow. She stirred and sat up, she realised who the boy was and jumped up with a noise of joy.

"James!" Claudia called out to him, Emily sat up and stared at the boy; she knew who he was but there was always a hatred for him that she could never find the source of. The two embraced and the boy pulled his head back and kissed her on the lips. Emily pulled the book further over her eyes to shield herself from the scene. _That was why_.

"Claudia! I stopped by your house…But I guessed you would be here with Emily, you are always here with Emily…" She hugged him tighter and let go, to sit back down with Emily. Jake sat down too, right on top of Emily's second book, he pulled it out from under him and chucked it to the side, she scowled at him, he took the hint and smiled at her. He started to pull his side bag to his front and pulled out a can of larger, which he opened with one hand and took a heavy glug. "So how are ya then?" James had roughly cut short brown hair and his face was a little too old for him self, he talked with a slight slur but it made his Bristol accent really come out. Even at 16 he was drinking and smoking everything under the sun. Claudia looked to me for a response to his question. Claudia didn't look at Emily the same when James was around, the two were now a couple, and they both knew it wouldn't last but they may as well keep up the act. Claudia sort of looked to Emily but her face didn't flush red, her eyes didn't flutter and she never bit her lip. All of these were sort of give always, there was defiantly something between the two girls, something she couldn't understand.

"I'm fine thanks cook, sorry I have been stealing your girlfriend away too much, and I just can't control myself sometimes." Emily joked, she looked to the floor to avoid his reaction, and there was a second meaning behind her words. She really did like Claudia.

"Good to see you're happy! Not any people are these days! Too many people worried about what they are gonna do next; I sorted it out ages ago. Im going to college, me. Easy." He took another glug of his lager and set it down to his left. He got out a pack of fags and selected one, lit it and chucked it back into his bag.

"Smoking is so bad for your health." Claudia said hesitantly, she was more reserved and less of herself around him. She often worried about James' health and told him to quit but he never did, he started at 12 and was never going to end. It kept him calm otherwise he would have gone crazy.

"Fuck you, it ain't harmful! It's aloud of bollocks." He took a long drag and exhaled the smoke through a cheeky grin, his grin was almost as brilliant as Claudia's but never seen. He suddenly chucked the fag out behind him zipped his bag halfway to get up and go.

"Where are you going?" Claudia wasn't sad, she was slightly hopeful to be alone with Emily, but she too needed to keep up the act. She got up too, again leaving Emily to lie on the ground.

"Gotta go home 'ent I. Got shit to do. Have a good one yeah! You too Em's!" He kicked Emily's leg and snogged Claudia who grimaced at the mixture of lager and cigarettes. He slapped her arse and ran off back through the brush. A little bit of cloud had formed in the distance but nothing to put off the wonderful sunny afternoon. Claudia sighed and sat down staring at Emily. She pulled the book from Emily's face and smiled down at her, Claudia's finger started to trace small pattens onto Emily's lower arm, relaxing her. She looked up to see her face, it was all black, and the sun was directly behind her head, although it made seeing easier from the shadow. Suddenly Claudia leaned forward and laid right net to her, her face two inches from her own. Her body soon followed and Emily turned towards her too their knees knocking together, their hands intertwining. This was it, finally they were going to kiss, and it was Emily's dream. Claudia suddenly turned solemn.

"I don't want to go home…" She turned over and faced the other way, she curled into Emily, and Emily just laid there shocked at the sudden change in tone. Emily put her arm around Claudia and hugged into her. The clouds in the distance had now reached them and it was starting to get dark already.

"I know… I know." Emily replied slowly, unable to think of anything else to say that would change the mood, or lift her spirits, unable to help. She was helpless.

Emily sat quietly on the grass lawn of Claudia's house, listening. Screams were escaping from her house, short painful screams. Emily didn't think anything, she just listened. She wasn't sad, or angry or sympathetic, she just sat and listened. The screaming stopped, there was a door slam and nothing more, and the lights went out in the house. Sobs echoed in a rhythm out of Claudia's bedroom and then silence.

Claudia pulled her top over her head as she stood from Emily's dresser stool. Emily was still getting the drinks and cards to play whilst they were settling in for the night. Her top fell to the floor and was replaced by a simple strap top which was over her PJ hot pants. She crawled into Emily's bed and sat herself up with a bunch of pillows against the head board and waited, listening to the music that was blaring out of the docking station. She crossed her legs and set her hands on her knees, that day she was especially horny and it was not fair because she was with Emily and when Claudia is horny she at thing right. She attempted tapping a beat to match the bass of the song; she kept messing it up and then just gave up when she heard movement from downstairs. Emily entered the room, carrying a bottle of Smirnoff and a pack of cars in one hand and a pack of cheap shot glasses in the other.

"Who is ready for a break up party?" Emily joked and jumped onto the bed, just missing the bottle hitting her head, the bottle was not full; she had already started. Claudia took the bottle and the glasses, she chucked them aside along with the bottle top and chugged half of the contents. Her face screwed up and her mouth gasped for soothing air, she blindly gave the bottle back to Emily and clenched her hands up.

"I hate Vodka." Claudia slouched down and slowly opened the pack of cards, fingering the edge to pull the card seal free to reveal the contents. Emily snatched the pack off of her and ripped it open in one movement, poking her tongue out at her friend, she replied by pushing her backwards, spilling a shot of vodka over Emily's leg. "Opps, I got you wet." She laughed and moved off of the bed to get more drink, Emily watching her back and the way her ass moved in her tight hot pants. No. She looked at the mess on her lap and moved to get out of her PJ pants and into her underwear. Pink with white lace, a girly compliment to her skinny body. The edge of the bed dipped slightly as she sat on it, the alcohol starting to cloud her mind slightly. Faces could be made out of the bumps in the old style ceiling as she stared wondering what to do with herself once she left school. Claudia could be heard making a ruckus in the kitchen but she was ok, Emily continued staring and her eyes slowly closed and reopened to Claudia smoking on her windowsill. Emily just stared at the sight, Claudia sitting there the smoking slowly releasing itself from her mouth, grey clouds of mystery escaping through the window into the open air. Emily moved across the bed and sat on the edge to watch her, her hair and how it fell smoothly down her back and how she was not wearing a top but only a bra.

"It's fucking hot in this house you know." Claudia extinguished the fag in the air and chucked it. Elegant was the word to describe how she stepped down from the sill, onto the wooden floor and the bed. Clumsy was the word when referring how to fell onto the bed. Emily smiled and did not speak; she sighted the new bottle of liquid and swigged it, offering to Claudia with her eyes. She took the drink and sat closer. They both sat awkwardly silent opposite each other, the pack of cards and drink now discarded on the side table. It was strange, Claudia lifted herself from her position, pushed Emily against her pillow. Emily stayed silent she didn't know what was happening, she froze unsure of what to do, how to respond to Claudia moving forward. Claudia's hand slid behind her head and pulled her into a kiss, her lips pushing against the others, opening slightly and breathing heavily, she kissed again but Claudia pulled away. Her hand was removed and she sat back, leaving Emily with her eyes closed and lips yarning for more. Her eyes opening in shock and she sat up, still facing, her legs moved to the side and her arm across her thighs. Darkness hit the room like a bolt and her eyes adjusted from the now lack of adrenaline, in her veins, the curtains open to reveal the clouded sky and barely visible stars.

Claudia sat there and held her wild black styled hair with her left hand and bit her lip staring at Emily. Sheets scattered around her bare legs. Emily sat up and moved towards Claudia whose back fell down as she climbed on top of her. Hands moved in search of skin a new rush of experimental excitement coming over the two of them, Claudia's top was pulled off, at the same time her own hands worked at Emily's bra strap, fumbling with her fingers and then slipping it over her arms.

Claudia paused for a moment and looked away, she crawled out from under Emily, and she pulled her top back over her head and her arms pushed through their holes. Emily sat back and realised where they had gone. Her bra was paced back and strapped up once again and then looked out of the window. A noise from downstairs alerted that the parents were home.

"I told you that it was never going to work! You cant sell this contraption, it's a death trap!" Emily's mother shouted from below. The two girls fell silent on her bed.

"I honestly thought it could work, I'm sorry, I am, but all I need are these new parts and then it will be ok, I can use the profits to pay it!" Emily's fitness freak dad fumbled for excuses, there was a slamming of doors and a sigh and silence. "Hello girls!" Her dad called and then shut the living room door… Uninterrupted silence.

"I can't see you any more." Claudia stared meaningfully into Emily's eyes as she gathered her bags off of the field floor and walked away. Emily stared after her, her mouth too dry to speak, her eyes to wet to see clearly let alone think. It was over. What could have been, what would never be.


End file.
